#16757 +(627)- [X]

{Sexican} oh I heard some legends about a world where you could get a gf and stuff.
{[12Lurk} its a place where women put out
{SoCK} url?

#16758 +(691)- [X]

{Plag} i liked women at 13
{Plag} even 11
{Pest} i liked woman since third grade
{Beat-Boy} ive liked men since i saw your sister

#16760 +(915)- [X]

<theTrick> Canada volunteered 10 Battleships, 4 Jet Fighters, and 200 Soldiers to the U.S. anti-terrorism cause, after the exchange rate, that came up to 4 canoes, 2 flying squirrels and 3 canadian mounties

#16763 +(26)- [X]

* +ETP checks his sweet, sweet ass, for human hands

#16764 +(119)- [X]

* ETP runs away like a one legged trialathete in the special olympics of your mind

#16765 +(31)- [X]

<Demented1> stupid Gonzaga...just unpacked my "Cinderella My Ass" Tshirt

#16766 +(211)- [X]

<Grim13> Mariah Carey's cleavage got nominated for "Worst onscreen couple"

#16767 +(46)- [X]

<cloud_171> u can't learn lots of stuff by reading

#16771 +(31)- [X]

{ExDeath} If I had a baby like Shiv, I'd shove it back in and put stitches in my wife's vagina ;(

#16772 +(-21)- [X]

{Trevy} Canadians don't hate the U.S. {Ertai} canadians are too simple for such a complex emotion

#16773 +(41)- [X]

<loser> http://www.goatse.cx
<loser> hahaha lol lol lol
<loser> you looked didn't you? HAHAHAHA
<bane> who gave you your name? your mom?
<bane> whoeva gave it to you, congratulate them for me will you?
<bane> it's appropiate

#16776 +(220)- [X]

<Pepsi> A Smith and Wesson beats four Aces.
<Tjousk> only if it's loaded

#16778 +(119)- [X]

<uno> you don't see us tossing around phrases like "throbbing cock" do you?

#16779 +(1478)- [X]

<Kevyn> So if black guys like white girls, and white guys like asian girls... what do the asian guys like?
<etoilet> hentai

#16780 +(567)- [X]

<Slime> Whenever hot chicks come up to me I always end up, like, vomitting everywhere and somehow my pants fall down, and then someone has a black eye, and everything goes wrong

#16781 +(452)- [X]

<Edge> i am right when I say there's no other reasonable explanation for anakin and amidala bringing R2D2 to naboo if not to shoot some really nasty homemade holographic porn?

#16786 +(482)- [X]

<BloodFromStone> I think my bathroom has the perfect geometry, so that no matter where or how something is dropped, it ends up in the toilet.

#16789 +(578)- [X]

<Daishi> i couldn't connect to irc, so i went out with my gf instead

#16790 +(-5)- [X]

·IAM-|speed|· 1v1 || gay butt sex || de_bed
·IAM-|speed|· 1v1 || gay butt sex || de_bed
·jimslim· !rules

#16796 +(40)- [X]

<Vash> wee-hee... I got two mroe week sof holidays = D
<^bat-sai> soldier of fortune holidays?
<Vash> eh?
<Samin> there the best kind

#16798 +(624)- [X]

<+subzero> =)
<@nebula> ;)
<@wickeD> =)
<Guest62972> :D
<@sony> SHUT THE FUCK UP HAPPY BASTARDS ARR

#16800 +(46)- [X]

<Bytie> speeding in dk is transcending stupidity
<Bytie> there aren't many roads up to it

#16802 +(50)- [X]

<NobleKale> old friend emails me with 'I have two special consideration exams next week. what do I study for them?'
<NobleKale> my reply: 'RTFM'

#16806 +(412)- [X]

<Zephyrr> Nobody should steal my band's name...not that they'd want it...but if they do, I'll tell my mother and she'll do stuff...
<Zephyrr> So there.
<Undine> Fear Zephs mom.
<Undine> She does stuff.

#16807 +(172)- [X]

<mptBreak> hyatt, what are you doing?
<hyatt> mpt, sitting here in my underwear talking to you.

#16808 +(502)- [X]

<[OKW]Buchwald> is it "cheating" on your girlfriend if you invite a couple of girls over to get naked, and you end up jerking off on to their tits, but you never touch them?
<[SS]Corky> NO!
<[SS]Corky> did this happen?
<[OKW]Buchwald> well, gimme a few minutes :)

#16812 +(163)- [X]

Pat877:    nice...
OB1Jenobe: w3rd
Pat877:    ok stop that
OB1Jenobe: wh4t?
Pat877:    i don't under stand that crap.. and u know it
OB1Jenobe: 0 |<
Pat877:    dick

#16813 +(121)- [X]

<B-ob> if (sleep < 0) then talk = null
<Stonefish> oh smeg off

#16814 +(45)- [X]

<Freakazoid> its like putting hotdog skins over dog turds

#16817 +(47)- [X]

<Nago> ... can you transmit aids from your hand to your cock?

#16818 +(86)- [X]

<Nago> hmm... my coke tastes a bit like flesh...

#16822 +(624)- [X]

<Packet> my boss just walked by one of the contractors that get canned friday
<Packet> and goes "HEY! I thought I fired you!"
<hmodes> "oh wait, i did..  HAHAHAHAHA!"
<hmodes> i aspire to crush people's souls like that some day

#16833 +(652)- [X]

<grier> you think you're so god damn floorless
<grier> so superior
<XfitzyX> do you mean flawless?
<girer> oh fucken leave me alone
* grier has quit IRC (Exit: i am so alone in this empty world)

#16835 +(641)- [X]

<JaYsOn``> why the fuck do i always attract gay dudes
<moonbeam> um, well you do go to gay bars
<JaYsOn``> yeah but im straight! surely theres other straight guys there

#16839 +(194)- [X]

<Tocool> Im so bored
<Tocool> I can predict my day
<Tocool> I woke up at 12:30, will sit around on computer till about 4, head to work, come back at 10:30, sit on computer till 2, go to bed
<Shaddix> pretty good
<Tocool> This isnt the normal course of action, just recent turn of events have left me with very lil to do
<Shaddix> oh
<Shaddix> impotentcy?

#16842 +(1029)- [X]

<limeking> Hey jen, ya wanna come over and we can wrap ourseves in plastic, shit ourselvves, and then eat our own shit while listening to MC hammer?
<Jennie254> Ewwwww gross!
<Jennie254> That's fucked up! Why would you even THINK I'd want to listen to MC Hammer?? .

#16848 +(327)- [X]

< espo> this movie would be better if Mel Brooks made it
< h2odragon> schindler's list?

#16857 +(199)- [X]

<roman> as soon as i wake up, i'm going to the atm to get 200 bucks..
<roman> then i'm ordering a whore
<foobar> haha roman no you're not
<roman> dude, i called one today and she was like "do you need company for tonight?" and i was like "well, maybe" and she was like "for 200, i stay an hour and a half, we get naked and we get nasty"
<roman> you order them like pizza, dude

#16858 +(621)- [X]

<manero> MANLY THINGS:
<manero> 1) JOHN WAYNE
<manero> 2) WAR MOVIES
<manero> 3) BEER BRATS
<rebrane-> 3) WAR MOVIES WITH JOHN WAYNE
<rebrane-> 4) FARTING
<manero> 5) LARGE CIGARS
<rebrane-> 6) CARS
<rebrane-> 7) FIRE
<manero> 8) BOWLING
<rebrane-> 9) CARS ON FIRE
<ian> 10) BEAR SUIT
<rebrane-> 11) GUNS
<rebrane-> 12) GUITARS
<skitzo> 11) ANAL SEX WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND IN THE TOOL SHED
<Primary> 13) JOHN WAYNE'S GUN
<rebrane-> there's already an 11, skitzo

#16866 +(305)- [X]

<MartinBlank> I knew a guy who dressed up for Halloween as a giant penis with ferns growing around the base, and said he was dressed as a dickweed.

#16868 +(72)- [X]

<Valkyrie> no, but Westlife is fake
<Valkyrie> Flying without wings?
<Valkyrie> PUHLEAZE
<Valkyrie> more like getting high on KFC

#16883 +(166)- [X]

[#perl]
<fraggle> how many days does it take to compile perl 5.6.1 on a 486?
<diclophis> haha

#16885 +(475)- [X]

< Tobester> I downloaded a file named JESSICA ALBA LESBIAN PORN SEEN DIVX at 12mb and it was a guy fisting himself

#16886 +(149)- [X]

<Jon_R> OH NO
<Jon_R> my page crashes netscape!
<Jon_R> whatever shall I do

#16897 +(126)- [X]

<@Linguica> you say "katana" and while the rest of us guys think of ninja swords, AndrewB thinks of doll dresses

#16900 +(23)- [X]

[ctcp(the_sponge)] PING
ùíù CTCP PING reply from The_Sponge: +++ATH

#16904 +(258)- [X]

<kdoom> Duke: you need a hobby
<DukeNukem> kdoom: like beastiality?
<kdoom> perfect

#16906 +(251)- [X]

<@Afterglow> .  I also have a familiarity with local area networks, including DHCP, DNS, penis, and Microsoft networking file shares.

#16908 +(120)- [X]

<endura> fuck women, I got me a national geographic and a bottle of gergins hand lotion, I'm fucking set for the next 10 years

#16910 +(421)- [X]

<@Tilt> this is the funniest thing i have ever read in a sources TODO list
<@Tilt> o Learn C