#58722 +(167)- [X]

<TsN|Wildchild> yes Im a nerd... Im pushing 30 and I enjoy playing video games, so sue me bitch
<TsN|AgentABC> im pushing 16 WC, i feel you pain
<TsN|Wildchild> thats puberty abc it will pass

#58723 +(344)- [X]

<Lazy_Robot> Sometimes they dont label the gay porn gay on kazaa....
<Lazy_Robot> I wonderd why the guys were fucking
<Lazy_Robot> thought some ladies were coming....
<Lazy_Robot> took awhile b4 I realised.

#58730 +(256)- [X]

RetardedCrow: www.ragingrooster.com
Chloe Margarita: You find the oddest sites. How do you do that?
RetardedCrow: I looked up cock.
RetardedCrow: Fights, er, cock FIGHTS

#58732 +(340)- [X]

<dreawn> I found out earlier today from an ex-AF friend of mine that a gallon
          of prize winning bull semen sells for 10 L
<dreawn> err 10 K
<dreawn> so I've taken up a new occupation and double life as a semen rustler.
<Marmalade420> so i need is polar bear semen
<Marmalade420> and i can get money
<Marmalade420> all
<dreawn> well, prize-winning bull semen.
<dreawn> you could join my gang of ruthless thugs who steal semen from large
          creatures and try to sell it
<Marmalade420> sure
<dreawn> nothing like fleeing the farm of a north dakota farmer with a gang of
          lawmen chasing you in pickup trucks worrying about spilling some
          bull gravy out of a tin pail
<dreawn> nope, nothing at all.

#58734 +(266)- [X]

<torch> is a 19" monitor big enough to run 1600x1200, or should i get a 21"?
<qball> 1600x1200 is kinda tight on the 19
<qball> actually it's very tight
<Matt97GT> like 9 y/o tight?
<ReeferCpe> male or female?

#58739 +(147)- [X]

<ally> i wonder what postage of a live animal would be to washington >.>
<rcg> illegal?

#58742 +(166)- [X]

<%kc1313> im a good analizer
[<Nematocyst> ANALIZER?
<Nematocyst> OR ANALYZER
<%kc1313> yeah the second

#58743 +(1401)- [X]

<@Campbell> I saw the best thing today... I was around at a mates place and these Jehovah's Witnesses came around preaching their shit
<@Campbell> So my mate invites them in and sits down and offers them pizza and cookies.
<@Campbell> After about 15 minutes they left very happy.
<@Campbell> We spotted them about an hour later lying in a park staring at the sky
<@Campbell> I guess those hash cookies and that magic mushie pizza really did its job.
<@Campbell> Who said drugs were bad?!

#58748 +(501)- [X]

<@_aa_> I need more friends
<@_aa_> good ones
<@_aa_> instead of bad friends
<@_aa_> but I guess there's no such thing as bad friends
<biVulate> aa: join a fraternity :P
<@_aa_> I said friends not people who will super glue my penis to a milk crate when I'm asleep

#58754 +(177)- [X]

<The_Cold> I wish it was the end of January.
<Tenchi147> it is
<Tenchi147> in japan...
<Tenchi147> in japan it's the year 2025
<The_Cold> I wish it was the end of january in North America.
<Tenchi147> it is
<Tenchi147> in canada
<Tenchi147> it's like 1805 in canada

#58765 +(240)- [X]

<AlpViper> apparantly my motherboard temp is 72 degrees
<AlpViper> is that bad
<Nom> farenheight or celcius ?
<Nom> if its celcius then yes, its bad
<AlpViper> oh dear

#58770 +(171)- [X]

* wintax accidentally substitutes tequila for olive oil while trying to make salad dressing

#58781 +(113)- [X]

<KMQ> foo is not xxxx
<Skunks> foo *can* be xxxx
<KMQ> no...
<KMQ> fooo can be xxxx
<Skunks> heh
<KMQ> but not foo
<Skunks> variable length is not limited by the name of the variable :P

#58790 +(43)- [X]

<NateDog> when you don't even want to pay $0.00 for something you must be REALLY cheap

#58800 +(181)- [X]

<Anon> holy crap, you know you've been on IRC too long when you see p133 and think 'plee'...

#58801 +(29)- [X]

<jre> WHAT?  They pulled the teeth out POST-MORTEM?
<jre> What losers
<jre> The Nazis have just lost so much respect from me

#58815 +(85)- [X]

<NateDog> HH, I'd accept a blowjob from anyone as long as they didn't have herpes or some other mouth disease
<`Syntax> Nate would accept a blowjob from *!*@*

#58825 +(296)- [X]

tom: I deep throated a banana once
tom: I'm good at it
tom: all the girls in class looked at me funny tho

#58831 +(126)- [X]

<jre> http://www.toronto.com/feature/344/  "The cemetery's roots date back to the Primitive Methodists."
<jre> Primitive Methodists
<AFRICAN_THUNDER> so in other words 1967

#58832 +(203)- [X]

<likwid8> anyone know where I can get the ABC special on how hackers get movies for free?

#58844 +(419)- [X]

SquallBane: True gamers don't need controllers/keyboards/mice.
SquallBane: They memorize the game and play it in their head.
blindpyro: wtf.
blindpyro: then how do you play mulplayer.
SquallBane: You get three friends to sit in the same room and rattle off verbose descriptions of what's happening.

#58846 +(720)- [X]

<TheThree> your special?
<Mj> you're
<TheThree> sorry my grammer sucks
<Mj> grammar
<TheThree> as dose my spelling
<Mj> does
<TheThree> i give up

#58852 +(244)- [X]

<Donut[4]> DEFRAG TIME
<_ry0suke_> deFAG
* Donut[4] has quit IRC (Quit: DEFRAG IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN EVERYONE)
* Donut has joined #walktheplank
<Donut> HEY WAIT
<Donut> F U =(
* Donut has quit IRC (Quit: )
<_ry0suke_> :(

#58858 +(1810)- [X]

<domenow> I'm gripping your cock hard
<ThAtGuy> i'm feeling your breasts
<ThAtGuy> my dick is getting really hard now
<domenow> yeah, mine too
<domenow> I mean... err.

#58860 +(178)- [X]

<Lithium> if i buy a hardware firewall right - i just stick it on, tell it to block all ports - tada
<Lithium> easy peasy
<stephen> all ports?
<Lithium> i aint got time to arse about isntalling software firewalls on every machine
<Lithium> i tried before
<Noodle> there's an easier and cheaper way to block all ports
<Noodle> pull the RJ45 out :P

#58869 +(480)- [X]

<sCoTTiii> is there actually any nice gurls in here, who dont put out, and arnt sluts and are over 16 ? lol, msg me man
<My`Albanian`Ass> opposite to that, msg me :)

#58871 +(296)- [X]

<Agent> [02:02] * king_away is back from Sex0ring my HAND :D. I was gone for 18secs
<Agent> You should see a doctor about that.
<Agent> 18 secs?!
<king_minkus> :D
<king_minkus> yep
<king_minkus> my hand is good
<king_minkus> DAMN good
<Agent> I'll uh... take your word for it :)
<Silent_Remorse> 18 secs? Your pathetic
<Silent_Remorse> ;p
<king_minkus> i repeat
<king_minkus> my hand is good
<Silent_Remorse> I pity the woman who you eventually trick into having sex with you

#58894 +(1003)- [X]

<GamespitterZ420> i wanted to know why your name is blue and why it has an @in front of it?
<@Shadoe> I'm a fucking smurf with a tumor
<GamespitterZ420> damn sorry dude my condolences

#58901 +(205)- [X]

<@Shadoe> I don't want to have sex with you
<@Shadoe> EVAR
<Vladimere> yeah yeah
<Vladimere> i've heard it before
<Vladimere> that's what they all say, and then they end up staring at the headboard
<@Shadoe> yeah, going "jesus christ when will it end"

#58910 +(212)- [X]

<+DangerMan> I liked cold weather a lot better when I was fat
<bmwii> ya, an extra 30 pounds helps through the winter =)
<+ZombiEater> ..or a jacket

#58923 +(368)- [X]

<Shadoe> baby collars
<Shadoe> hahaha
<Shadoe> "here baby baby" *yank*
<Shadoe> <---- should not have children.

#58951 +(309)- [X]

Lukerul1: my mom got a laptop, she opened it up, and was looking at it, and asked what it was
Lukerul1: i wanted to cry

#58963 +(150)- [X]

(XengeL|MakingAnimeVideos): omfg
(XengeL|MakingAnimeVideos): whose good with windows paint program?
(nemesis): omfg
(nemesis): who isnt?

#58965 +(702)- [X]

* jesus takes off your pants.
* Sexypants is now known as Sexy
<jesus> rawr
<Sexy> jesus took off my pants
<Kitsa> the lord works in mysterious ways

#58967 +(144)- [X]

<The_Snowman> but as always, the kids got a ton of gifts.... :/
<The_Snowman> we've spent all day clearing out their room to get room for all the new shi.... toys
<Scarebear> We did the same thing yesterday.  They got heaps!  Yesterday was cleanup day
<The_Snowman> im really thinking of kick/banning grandparents from #xmas :/

#58970 +(470)- [X]

<Mich> do you call a drinking fountain thing a water fountain or a bubbler?
<Mystiq> who the fuck would call it a bubbler
<Mich> it must be a regional thing
<Mich> everyone here says bubbler
<Mystiq> yeah well your state voted bush

#58995 +(80)- [X]

<Rackshack-GregM> got my first DVD-A on Tuesday
<RS-Andrew> dvd-a? double vaginal double anal?
<Rackshack-GregM> hah
<Rackshack-GregM> DVD Audio

#58997 +(647)- [X]

<Peter> My brother got a $1500 car deck for $6.58 today.
<kaliyama> Was that the cost of the crowbar and ski mask?

#58999 +(269)- [X]

<Ishtar-AFK> during chinese new years... they give redpockets filled with money
<Ishtar-AFK> for good luck or something, but the important part is cash
<SiWaRD> you're chinese?
<SiWaRD> I thought you were Korean
<Ishtar-AFK> i'm chinese
<Ishtar-AFK> wtf
<Ishtar-AFK> when i go back to visit my grandparents... they say i dont follow traditions
* sweeps starts thinking up racial slurs
<sweeps> when i go back to visit my grandparents... they say i dont follow traditions <- you mean communism?
<SiWaRD> do your grandparents know martial arts?
<sweeps> do they fly?

#59018 +(251)- [X]

<PhD> i got woken up by a freakin woodpecker today
<PhD> i thought someone was knocking :-(
<Katlizy> doesnt every guy get one of those in the morning?

#59027 +(-125)- [X]

<biXen> LMAO, I got kicked from DC because of animal porn? WTF?
<biXen> I dont have any animal porn!
<biXen> well I guess for some people movies that has black guys in them, they can go as animals

#59054 +(1037)- [X]

<Cithorn> Right now.... I'm killing you with my mind
<Cithorn> Tell me if you die
<AntiarcPrime> If  I'm dead, I can't typ........asdddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
* AntiarcPrime dies
<AntiarcPrime> [ Restore from last save point? ] (Yes/No)
<AntiarcPrime> Yes
* AntiarcPrime respawns
<Cithorn> Aww sunova bitch, now I know what it's like to be a Final Fantasy Villain

#59057 +(352)- [X]

<markogogo> I once had a dream that there was a huge join flood here. And I kept screwing up when trying to set the mode +i. :/
<Kel> geek nightmares

#59062 +(1348)- [X]

<X5> do what horny college idiot men do every night, hump park benches!
<smackfoo> last time i humped a park bench i was late into my teens
<smackfoo> it was a quiet, peaceful night in hyde park
<smackfoo> the bums had all been incinerated in an unfortunate event with the department of water and power
<smackfoo> i stepped up to a cute little wood number, couldn't have been older than 17
<smackfoo> i rubbed her thighs...er...handles, and she cooed in the moonlight
<smackfoo> fearing splinters, i gently waxed her humps, making sure to remove any hint of sharpness
<smackfoo> slowly, gently, i removed my pants...
<smackfoo> um
<smackfoo> you guys know the rest
<Cithorn> Keep going
<Cithorn> I'm not done yet

#59078 +(148)- [X]

<Riz> if Ron Jeremy dies I'm gonna put in a request for a "organ" donation

#59084 +(156)- [X]

<onelove--> i was going to use the holidays to get some booty from my exgirlfriend
<onelove--> but she's on this big christian kick
<onelove--> complete with no sex before marriage
<onelove--> so i guess there's no reason in talking to her anymore

#59086 +(47)- [X]

RetardedCrow: I'm listening to a song called "Back of the bus."
RetardedCrow: Sung by black rappers.
Esotcalag: Oh god....
RetardedCrow: And they yell at us when we call them niggers, wtf?
RetardedCrow: Oh, I'm sorry, 'Niggas.'
RetardedCrow: Fucking crackas.
Esotcalag: I find it ironic that despite the issue that was during the sixties, most black kids always seems to flock to the back of the bus.
RetardedCrow: They still do...
RetardedCrow: I guess habbits are hard to break.

#59091 +(205)- [X]

<Mansion_Maniac> 3 types of people on the internet = convinced they're ugly, convinced they're life has no meaning, and convinced they could kick your ass despite they don't know jack about you

#59104 +(-58)- [X]

<Squanky> I hope they gave me the right CPU because I paid $350 for it

#59120 +(300)- [X]

<sgamer> man
<sgamer> i know how pepsi can beat coke
<NookieMonster> Hey Gamer!
<sgamer> they need to get britney dumbass again
<NookieMonster> by tasting better?
<sgamer> and they need a commercial
<sgamer> during the super bowl
<sgamer> at the hottest part of the super bowl
<NookieMonster> Britney with no panties...
<sgamer> and she does this:
<sgamer> takes a drink
<sgamer> *ahhh*
<sgamer> then says "oh yeah, i swallow"
<sgamer> then keeps drinking
<sgamer> fade to pepsi logo, fin
<NookieMonster> Thats great!!
<sgamer> i am an advertising genius