#100159 +(673)- [X]

PunkRocks64: we watched Matrix 1 in chemistry today.
PunkRocks64: and you know how Morpheus says the beginning of the end was the creation of AI?
EventuallyAdonis: what about it?
PunkRocks64: he says basically that the what started the machines taking over was human's fascination with AI..
PunkRocks64: and.. have you noticed that like 99% of our population is infatuated with American Idol .........
EventuallyAdonis: that's deep

#100185 +(253)- [X]

<[Piratez]> i had a computer security class; teacher talking about sept. 11 bombing.. he goes.. 'you know how much computers were lost in the bombing'....

#100194 +(1225)- [X]

<SaxxonPike> there are 10 types of people in this world: those who understand binary, and those who don't give a fuck
<jon`> whats binary?
<SaxxonPike> and then there's you.

#100203 +(343)- [X]

<devilc0ck> guess who'z d/l'ing turtle power
<devilc0ck> guess who'z d/l'ing turtle power
<devilc0ck> guess who'z got the ninja rap..
<fingers> guess who's all alone in thinking how kewl that is

#100245 +(756)- [X]

<+[aa]Ho_O> i would fuck any chick i see on the internet
<+sm4k[X-D]> www.tubgirl.com
<+[aa]Ho_O> fuck.
<+[aa]Ho_O> wouldnt WOULDNT WOULDNT WOULDNT WOULDNT

#100276 +(197)- [X]

<Bob> I was gonna join the army, until the war started

#100285 +(230)- [X]

<K8> well the theme was aincient history
<josh_ip_te> oh,
<josh_ip_te> and you went as a viking?
<K8> and my friend had some home made costumes
* josh_ip_te wouldve gone as a black michael jackson

#100288 +(857)- [X]

<KZoo> COX
<devilboy> VAGINAL ORIFICE
<KZoo> thats not a service provider
<KZoo> well....i guess it is

#100292 +(419)- [X]

<Uhh_Duh> I've got four kick-ass cisco routers coming in the mail.
<Uhh_Duh> Sorry ladies.. I'm taken...

#100294 +(1117)- [X]

<noddy> this nekkid gurl is a cutie
<noddy> she's very nekkid now
<noddy> and playing with a carrot
<noddy> or a dildo
<noddy> not sure
<Mortarion> remind me never to eat anything you cook

#100308 +(692)- [X]

<mg|Nibble> haha I just use my daughter text phone to email her friends she was gay
<LeadOP-Toast> isn't that a bit sick? :P
<mg|Nibble> yup
<LeadOP-Toast> kk :)
<LeadOP-Toast> She's not going to be happy :P
<mg|Nibble> servers her right for running a £200 phone bill up on me
<LeadOP-Toast> oh, fair nuff then
<LeadOP-Toast> :P
<mg|Nibble> revenge rocks :)

#100314 +(76)- [X]

<the_almighty_shoe> i bought concert tickets for a stranger i met on online once.
<the_almighty_shoe> but it was an Tori Amos concert, so it was his/her's loss.

#100322 +(816)- [X]

<Gareth> HOW DO I DOWNLOAD GAMES!!!
<TK421-> WHOA LIKE I CAN TELL YOU HOW YO!
<TK421-> Go to download.com and download a few game demos, depending on which ones you download they will combine to make different versions of MECHADEMO! *sings power rangers theme song*
<Gareth> DUDE FUCK YOU

#100327 +(84)- [X]

[Kris] friggen brazilians are still going nuts, even second defacement is by some group which hangs on brasnet
[jimmiejaz] they just got electricity, they've got to catch up.

#100336 +(407)- [X]

<ch> Cn linux just drop some chrcters from the keybord or is it more likely tht my lptop keybord is bd?

#100373 +(180)- [X]

* norn changes topic to 'scorp on marriage: [06:08] <Scorpy> It's like free falling off a cliff, it's fun and exciting for a while and then you hit the ground and die or break most of your bones in your body.'

#100374 +(188)- [X]

<  ILjWerk> I'm on terror alert level fuscia

#100378 +(432)- [X]

<deceptika> god created shit....honda made it move

#100413 +(294)- [X]

<klafka4> i actually am sick
<klafka4> i think it's allergy
<AlbinoSqrl> to real life?
<klafka4> what? real life is great i've got my fantasy and scifi books, my anime, my tv!

#100415 +(1506)- [X]

<windows_macgeek> Is there a way to overclock a compact flash card to have more storage?
<InvisableMan> umm..... can you overclock the memory in your computer to give you more storage?
<windows_macgeek> HAHAHA!!!! Of course not, idiot!
<InvisableMan> you just took the words right out of my mouth.
<windows_macgeek> ...Oh.

#100452 +(388)- [X]

<Monarx> If it's 2003, where's my flying cars?
<Monarx> And jetpacks?
<Proto_K> hehe
<Proto_K> all those old cartoons
<Monarx> And other hoohah?
<Proto_K> that depict the "future" in 1991 AD
<||bass> yea
<||bass> 1991
<||bass> Mc Hammer
<||bass> talk about a fuckin disappointment, huh

#100456 +(348)- [X]

<skie`> the guy who sits next to me in french class had a friend that was going through CS in college, so we were talking about that... probably 4 or 5 people turn around and say "What the hell, colleges have a CounterStrike department now?"

#100468 +(177)- [X]

<grem> hah
<grem> for the first time in years gold is actually worht MORE than weed

#100470 +(765)- [X]

<Deepthroat> The thing that always got me about the goatse.cx guy is that he's wearing a wedding ring. Does his wife know he can cram a week's worth of camping gear up there? Does she know that her husband's gaping ass has become an internet super sensation? Is it a secret, or is she a part of his anal adventures? Did she clap when he managed to solve a Rubik's cube using only the muscles of his colon?
<StarDonut> Deepthroat: For all you know, she's the one with the camera.

#100475 +(24)- [X]

<@modernman> Juicy.Pussies.Uncensored.JAV-XRS
<@modernman> id fuckin hope its uncensored

#100479 +(223)- [X]

[+miles] okay, two irish guys are walking down this street, right...okay they see this sign that says: "Tree Fellers Wanted" and they go, "oh blast, its a pity theres only the two of us"

#100481 +(714)- [X]

<ChOwShAdY> like i fucked a 14 year old when i was 17
<ChOwShAdY> she was immature as a motherufcker
<@impuritor> dude, that is quite possibly the dumbest thing i've ever heard anyone say in my entire life
<@impuritor> that's like saying
<@impuritor> "My car runs like shit when i'm out of gas"

#100483 +(11)- [X]

<Yellah> Celebrate the decrimalisation of Pot
<[Piratez]> lets make this national
* [Piratez] replaces the maple leaf on the Canadian flag with a weed leaf.

#100486 +(438)- [X]

<nailer> I think I'm tired - I just spent three seconds wondering why `Data Track' by `Data Track' wouldn't play from this CD

#100487 +(246)- [X]

<Lyndrek> I don't like Pulp Fiction
<Nalani> Why would you dislike Pulp?
<DarkLich> Maybe it confused him.
<DarkLich> Maybe he was like, "What?! John Travolta died two scenes ago!"

#100489 +(647)- [X]

<@John> why does there have to be sunlight
<@Luster> so us geeks know when to go to bed

#100494 +(307)- [X]

<eidos> INFINITE/2 = middle, DUH

#100498 +(286)- [X]

<TriNitY> how are u only 1/2 hour ahed?
<TriNitY> ur clock iz fux0r3d
<Mr_Man> i set my clocks ahead for no good reason other than i feel like i step into the future when i enter my room

#100523 +(56)- [X]

<Vangalisk> Gawd, if that american idle twat got any heavier rotation her makeup is going to fly off her face in large cakes

#100524 +(220)- [X]

<boyd> anyway, theres a survey on the back and one question is "What was the easiest way to make new friends at your Teritary Institution?"
<boyd> if my name wasn't going to be attached to it, i'd put something like "i'm doing computer science, I  HAVE NO FRIENDS

#100527 +(565)- [X]

<Snipe> you forget though, I have wayyy too much time on my hands
<Snipe> wait, no i dont
<Snipe> fuck that project is due tomorrow
<Snipe> brb

#100541 +(396)- [X]

* woodss has Favourites
* fungi has Bookmarks
* morner has a secretary :P
morner: well, more of an assistant really
morner: ...
morner: ok, it's a pda

#100559 +(103)- [X]

<Necroth|HAPPY> <|707th|Selerox> not even god understands women <-- not even womans understand womans ;)
<|MoK|Fluid> Thank god, else we wouldn't have catfights.

#100570 +(1252)- [X]

* ConstipatedElderlyMan bleeds internally and dies, another silent victim of constipation
<gothik> shit happens
<Adam^> not for him.

#100595 +(50)- [X]

<RANMA316> Japanese snacks rock
<PooIsYummy> No they don't, japanese snacks suck.
<PooIsYummy> They aren't treats, if you gave them to small children in north america they'd start to cry

#100719 +(360)- [X]

neiras: "Next week on FOX, watch lions eat Christians!"
ennoia: Fuck
ennoia: I need cable

#100732 +(168)- [X]

* Maho pats the trash can... "was it good for you?"

#100737 +(1724)- [X]

Trauma Kittten: OMG
MY CAT JUST JIZZED ON ME
Trauma Kittten: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
lordviram: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
lordviram: wtf didi you do to it?
lordviram: i didnt know you were into all that
lordviram: lol
lordviram: wow
Trauma Kittten: well he's a longhair cat
Trauma Kittten: and sometimes his pants get matted
Trauma Kittten: so i was holding him on my lap
Trauma Kittten: and he was purring with his eyes closed and i'm like trying to untangle them
Trauma Kittten: then i realized one of the bunches wasn't a tangle, it was his nuts
Trauma Kittten: they both kinda feel the same
Trauma Kittten: then my hand gets a glob of clear stuff on it
lordviram: wow
Trauma Kittten: i'm gonna kill myself
lordviram: that's just
lordviram: hahahahaha
Trauma Kittten: i just jerked my cat off
lordviram: i'd say something but nothing can really add to the effect of admitting you just jerked off your cat
Trauma Kittten: heh....
Trauma Kittten: i'm surprised that one didn't make it to your profile heh
lordviram: that's cuz i'm gonna post that to bash.org
lordviram: LOL
Trauma Kittten: !
lordviram: ....wow
Trauma Kittten: OH NO
Trauma Kittten: the cat is back
Trauma Kittten: heh
lordviram: maybe it wants to return the favor
lordviram: heh
Trauma Kittten: well there was one site i saw where it recommended putting whipped cream on your clit and letting em lick it off
Trauma Kittten: but i wouldn' go that far, i don't think
lordviram: you dont think?
lordviram: o.0
lordviram: well. you did just jack off your cat.
Trauma Kittten: BUT I DIDN'T MEAN TO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD
Trauma Kittten: i was just trying to make him have nice pants
lordviram: you are one freaky chick

#100740 +(561)- [X]

<Wippersnapper> Guess what fools, I am going skydiving
<schnorks> Why does that make us fools?
<Wippersnapper> Because I am jumping out of a plane... oh wait

#100757 +(140)- [X]

<King-of-darknesses> my kernel is panic'ing , i need to reassure him some

#100758 +(308)- [X]

e l i t e m r p: no work on monday, woo waaaaa
r ever end in e: WHY not
e l i t e m r p: holiday
e l i t e m r p: the day we remember all the people who died to give me a day off from work

#100767 +(266)- [X]

<Tiffany> mapso did you know that my brother is having a baby?
<Mapso> Is it yours?

#100770 +(1106)- [X]

<Masao[RY]> DS: I really enjoy translating :-)
<Ninja-San> translate this: <^>(-_-)<^>
<DS> well
<DS> let's tranlate it from japanese to english
<DS>  <^>('_')<^>

#100781 +(102)- [X]

<Alter_Legiones> don't ya just hate it, when you try to find a rom. then you click on a link that you think takes you to a rom site, but is loaded with porn ads, and when the thing opens, the first thing you hear is "I WANT TO SUCK YOUR LONG COCK!* while your mom is in the room >_<

#100792 +(400)- [X]

<Destruya> HEY WOW I'M SO GOOD AT BF1942 BECAUSE I HANG OUTSIDE SPAWN POINTS
<Destruya> ESPECIALLY THE PERMANENT ONES
<fatehaze> lol
<Destruya> AND I FUCKING KILL EVERYONE BEFORE THEY CAN SHOOT ME BACK
<Destruya> AND PEOPLE LIKE THIS "DESTROYA" GUY YELL AT ME PROBABLY BECAUSE I'M SO FUCKING AWESOMELY 1337
<Destruya> AND HE'S JEALOUS OF MY MAD SKIZZILS, YO
<Destruya> OMGOMGOMG
<Destruya> I SHOULD WRITE A TIPBOOK ON BF1942
<Destruya> "BF1942: HOW TO BE FUCKING COOL LIKE ME IN JUST ONE VERY SIMPLE STEP"
<Destruya> </sarcasm>
<Destruya> I just got out of a really goddamned frustrating BF1942 game full of career cocksmoking permanent base campers.  Could you tell?