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#2887 +(527)- [X] <McMoo> those presents are wrapped like motherfuckers.
<McMoo> like very thoroughly wrapped motherfuckers.
#2888 +(435)- [X] <AnGeLFiRe> go screw a dog
<Pharaohe> come over to my house then babe
#2889 +(737)- [X] <Berzerker> Life is hard.
<Berzerker> unfortunately, you arent.
<Berzerker> call the national impotency hotline. 1-800-GET-BONE
#2892 +(99)- [X] <FLoBBaSKo> That'd be cool if there was a hermaphrodite that had their dick coming out of their vagina... they wouldn't be able to walk without having an orgasm.
#2893 +(597)- [X] <Berzerker> i shit too big
<Berzerker> i clog up the toilet without using toilet paper
<Berzerker> my parents think i use too much
<Berzerker> and im starting to get in trouble for doing it
<Berzerker> i dont wanna tell them "i shit big, sorry"
#2895 +(376)- [X] <blazemore> RZR033DCC IS OFFERING VIRUSES INFECTED WITH WAREZ
#2897 +(-21)- [X] <Pyre> Gumby's mom is hot
#2898 +(83)- [X] <XxDeThxX> thats what the sperm whales do..they check out the females then all the males rub against eachother til they spooge
#2899 +(384)- [X] *** hypr changes topic to '.'
<LkChaCha1> Ahh. . .hypr had his period. Must be that time of month.
#2902 +(74)- [X] <k> hm yes i believe to say d0f would be the correct way out of this interpretation situilimintation
#2903 +(3)- [X] <Berzerk0r> eD farted and it smelt like bvaD
#2904 +(729)- [X] <Berzerker> they gave christopher reaves a standing ovation
<Berzerker> and like
<Berzerker> he cant even stand up
<Berzerker> so hes like
<Berzerker> wtf
#2905 +(376)- [X] <BRASIL> IN MY COUNTRY TOO HOT TO GO OUTSIDE
<BRASIL> SO I SURF NET INSTEAD
#2906 +(265)- [X] <EFX> take a banana .. cut off the top .. squeeze the banana out gently keeping the peel intact.. get a empty toilet paper roll .. put the peel inside of it .. warm it up in the microwave .. and then stick your cock in it
#2907 +(345)- [X] <Berzerker> hey
<Berzerker> you hear about the new game they play at the white house?
<Berzerker> swallow the leader.
#2908 +(356)- [X] <DEMI1999> ed's hit an all time high of un-understandability
<DEMI1999> <eDz0ph_gb> d0f eye ,ent n0am
#2909 +(70)- [X] <blazemore> i saw a big crack in front of me, then this flash of light.. after that, i can't remember anything.
#2910 +(95)- [X] <Berzerker> like one time i shit on a bench in my school playground
<Berzerker> and like it smelt so bad
<Berzerker> and i covered it with playground gravel
<Berzerker> and like when the cafeteria aid came the next day she cleared it off with her hand
<Berzerker> and like
<Berzerker> poop!
#2911 +(951)- [X] * Berzerker gets hungry
* Berzerker eats his e's
*** Berzerker is now known as Brzrkr
#2912 +(499)- [X] <IceWizard> What the HELL is up with these candy companies? Little teeny bars are called 'Fun Size'.. Damn, Whats so fun about a smaller candybar?!?
#2913 +(212)- [X] <Berzerker> what are you goign to pick?
<ding> HAWT PAWKETS
#2915 +(386)- [X] <EFX> What's a dikfor?
#2916 +(1034)- [X] <{SaTaN}> GOD DAMN IT SUN OF A BITCH STOP CALLING ME SANTA IT IS "SATAN!!!!!!!!!!!!"
<DaRkShaMe> hi santa
#2921 +(488)- [X] (Fungus): idler, define " life " please :)
(Idler): Fungus: Life is the thing that grows in my fridge
(Idler): Starting to get really big now
(Idler): Might have to kill it some day
(NX): did u try to eat it?
(Idler): NX: No, that's what I should have done a long time ago
#2922 +(61)- [X] <Snag> on another note
<Snag> you know any fake tan shit i can buy?
<eldee> fake tan shit?
<eldee> wtf?
<Snag> ya
<Snag> i have supah white arms
<eldee> go to a tanning booth, give the bitch 5 bux and stick your arm in the pipe dude
#2923 +(434)- [X] <michael-> shut up
<michael-> i sucked a lot of cock to get where i am today
<kisama> heh
<kisama> at least you got to suck cock and not be ass raped like the rest of us
#2925 +(381)- [X] <Slant> evenpar123: What's up dog, word?
<evenpar123> dog?
<evenpar123> That's my slave name. My new name is "dogg"
#2927 +(274)- [X] <CmnstR> so i calls it ScRnr?
<Lord-Data> CmnstR: you call it a screener
<Lord-Data> the only reason you would type ScRnr would be if your e key wasnt working
#2928 +(473)- [X] <Kazz> Everybody kept screeching "DON'T DO IT LOOK AT ALL YOU'VE GOT TO LIVE FOR" and he was like "no im gona do it" and I said "How?" and he said "Knife through the heart" and I was like "Wicked. Send pics."
<Sharkey> My favorite one was back in #verge years ago. Finally after I ribbed her for about an hour she said that she'd slashed her wrists because of me. I asked her if she was typing with her tongue.
<Kazz> I suggested he fall on a chainsaw. He liked the messiness.
#2929 +(569)- [X] <neck> btw... bought an ice cream maker today :)
<qu4ntum> dont you mean a donut maker ?
<Lord-Data> very easy to get those confused ..
<neck> oh hell yeah
<neck> oh crap... it was a donut maker
#2930 +(494)- [X] <Muskratt> How can people like you guys survive infancy without bursting into flames from some major god (I don't care who) 's anger?
<MightyQuinn> easy
<MightyQuinn> we carry fire extinguishers
#2931 +(285)- [X] <profuse> its rather good, this is the first of anything of his that ive listened to
<profuse> heh im talkinglike im british or some shit
<al-x> hey
<al-x> americans say "rather" too
<al-x> except they say "i'd rather have a big slow car that's flashy than a car that isn't flashy but runs better"
#2933 +(124)- [X] <eldee> welp, i got some coding to do.. smell ya later
<eldee> Aimee: for you that's a literal statement
#2934 +(1702)- [X] <Potato> I've known her for years and I've always wanted to fuck her.
<Potato> But her last boyfriend was a 6 foot 7 black man.
<Potato> So I just don't try.
<Potato> I'm above average, but he was a giant black man.
<Potato> I mean, c'mon.
<Potato> He was like Godzilla, but black. Like Shaftzilla.
<memo> Did he smash Japanese skyscrapers with his dong?
<Potato> Yes.
<Potato> Yes he did.
#2935 +(450)- [X] <Object> booya my roommate, got in a fight last week.. this week, booya was starting a new job .. he gets in and finds out his new boss is the guy he fought last week, we thought it was pretty funny
#2937 +(330)- [X] <exbawx> $465 in debt. good luck to me.
<novocain> its yer own damn fault that 1. you work at taco bell 2. that you only work 4 hours a week
#2938 +(771)- [X] <BlackDeth> man this sucks
<BlackDeth> why is it that all drugs make you lazy and useless
<BlackDeth> they should invent one that motivates you to do homework and shit
#2940 +(535)- [X] <T_hibiki_> you catch your lady in bed with another man what do you do ?
<sparatik> tell him she has an STD
#2941 +(268)- [X] <BlackDeth> the only effect cocaine really has is it makes you want more cocaine :D
#2942 +(347)- [X] *** Now talking in #cars
*** Topic is 'No gay sex talk please thanks'
<spazzer> no gay sex talk eh?
<spazzer> this channel is going to be quiet then
#2949 +(290)- [X] <al-x> pam anderson had implants
<al-x> had them taken out
<al-x> just had them put back in
<al-x> she proly has zippers
<al-x> under her arms
<al-x> or somethign
#2952 +(289)- [X] <nstylz> i want to make a site that the people run it and then just forget about it and watch the $ go in
<Deadbolt> sorry, we already have a slashdot
#2954 +(283)- [X] <dregan> EGADS THE PAIN
<dregan> THE BITING, GNAWING PAIN
<dregan> THE SEARING, UNENDING.. UN.. mmm..
#2955 +(58)- [X] <trccccc> I was going down on this one girl once.... and her clit was the size of my pinkie... I was all DAMN and exscused myself and went back down to the party
#2956 +(309)- [X] <blazemore> my chair is starting to smell bad from me farting in it so much
<blazemore> either that or it's the underwear i've been wearing for 4 days
#2957 +(237)- [X] <trccccc> virus: go fuck a leprocohn
<brucel33t> I bet they give good head
<trccccc> maybe he will give you his bag of gold
<Reul> or what's in his sack
#2958 +(317)- [X] <datz510> u prolly race grandmas goin tot he grocery store too huh
<BenK> no
<BenK> I race hardcore racers
<BenK> people with tinted windows
<BenK> and 20 inch rims
<datz510> Ben.. like other hondas?
#2959 +(810)- [X] <Entomorph> blazemore, I know you
<Entomorph> oldskewl emu guy right?
<blazemore> heh yeah
<Apoc> irc is just wierd
<Apoc> no where else can you run into old friends that you have never met
#2960 +(651)- [X] <waterfire> All women are gay, or at least that's what they tell me
#2962 +(299)- [X] [jstepka-w] it's not gay, there are several key nerve endings in your prostate
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