#3456 +(351)- [X]

<jstepka-w> she said to me 'we need a few months off'
<Flav> "a few months?  sweet, that'll let me run through the bitches on my TODO list"

#3457 +(1031)- [X]

<Legatic> How can you think you matter when your URL has a tilde in it?

#3460 +(530)- [X]

<agrath> I banned him cause he pointed out i was a virgin

#3464 +(203)- [X]

<Object> i'm good for 15 minutes
<sh0> Object, 15 minutes ?!
<sh0> you better have a lot of cash to keep yo bitch loyal

#3465 +(436)- [X]

<f9|war3beta> These Mint Skittles taste like shit.
<Brentai> MINT SKITTLES?
<JDigital> f9: Tell me about it. Over here, we call the green ones "Excre-mint".
<JDigital> Alternatively known as "New car smell" flavour.

#3469 +(278)- [X]

<blazemore> Windows XP Professional Uptime: 4wks 4hrs 55secs
<blazemore> time to reboot
<ScumDog> that's so retarded
<mandarin> heh...uptime is sad
<mandarin> more sad is most *nix nerds have longer uptime records than relationship records ;)
<mightyflo> Relationship OSR2 Sexual Uptime: 2wks 6hrs 12secs

#3474 +(322)- [X]

<@Catgirl> The three stages of Catgirl hating: #1) "FUCK YOU I'M RIGHT YOU'RE WRONG" #2) "FUCK YOU I BET YOU'RE NOT A GIRL" #3) "FUCK YOU" *ban* PM: "I'd like to fuck you."

#3483 +(780)- [X]

<Darksyde> dood you make texas look like a big dildo
<blazemore> i'd rather be a big dildo than a small dildo
<blazemore> especially the kind the secretes fake jizz that tastes like oranges
<Geek-> lol
<Geek-> how would you know about that shit?
* blazemore is away

#3485 +(311)- [X]

<DrWoody> alcohol is my anti-drug.

#3487 +(64)- [X]

<]Di[ein> seriously..... imma put 2x turbos....nos....air intake...... get that pos lowered even though it is already lowered
<]Di[ein> get some 5's
<]Di[ein> (it has go cart wheels)
<Vandium> A FESTIVA
<Vandium> ROFL!
<]Di[ein> the only car in the world where u get a buy one get one free deal!

#3498 +(248)- [X]

<stack> if($want == "illegal") connect(efnet);

#3500 +(395)- [X]

<bdi> if you lookin' for sympathy, you better look between R and T in the fucking dictionary

#3502 +(391)- [X]

<Butters> this girl I'm talking to on AIM just tried out her new "pink panther"
<chowda> Butters: I'm sure "she" did :)

#3509 +(289)- [X]

<Rasputin> Episode 1 rocked!!!!!
<Rasputin> Let me rephrase.
<Rasputin> The trailer for Episode 1 ROCKED!!!!

#3510 +(356)- [X]

<Demamas> RAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWR! *explodes*
<Nyphur> BAD! NO BONE FOR Demamas! BACK IN YOUR CAGE !!
*** Signoff: Demamas (Ping timeout)
<Nyphur> oops
<Nyphur> I forgot I left his cage off the server

#3523 +(356)- [X]

<JFalcon> sex is too much work... and the customers always complain.

#3524 +(4604)- [X]

<Ouroboros> Has anyone ever logged into dev0n's FTP?
<Affe> ouro: that some kind of sexual innuendo?
<xpander> is that a euphemism?
<Ouroboros> Possibly
<Ouroboros> Shhh
<Ouroboros> I try to be subtle about these things.
<Affe> in that case, i 'log into dev0ns ftp' all the time
<Ouroboros> Yeah, she gave me her "login" but she won't reply to my "/msgs"
<Affe> dude i had 'sex' with her in the 'butt' the other day
<Affe> oh wait
<Affe> we're being subtle

#3526 +(828)- [X]

<Korben> tits
<darkraZor> yes, tits
<Soopa> i agree
<darkraZor> ...indeed

#3532 +(66)- [X]

<blazemore> indian, asian.. same difference, they both end with "ian"

#3535 +(260)- [X]

<ScumDog> I never treat women as members of the opposite sex, Tanya.

#3539 +(1088)- [X]

<craig> i'm sorry, i should've remembered that many people are pedanic here
<Crappy> it's pedantic

#3547 +(235)- [X]

<sQuEeDeN> <applet code="filename.jar"></applet>
<duckman> <monkey sex="now"></monkey>
<sQuEeDeN> <duckman sex="none" orientation="unknown"></duckman>

#3550 +(57)- [X]

<PowrSlave> dude once i got an altoid stuck up my gf's pussy 
<PowrSlave> and everytime i tried to fish it out with my tongue it went further up.  and she said it burned her hahaa

#3551 +(145)- [X]

<GiRLiE> hey it was funny the doc asked me if I have blood in my urine
<GiRLiE> thought of u

#3552 +(298)- [X]

<DAL9000> he prolly cried and then shot himself in the head 14 times
<Wronski> DAL9000: I think it would be rather difficult to shoot yourself in the head 14 times.
<DAL9000> Wronski: think about it.
<DAL9000> if he's stupid enough to use an imac and need help
<DAL9000> then he's prolly not using very much of his brain
<natescape> b'sides, they say we only use 10% of our brain most of the time anyway
<natescape> his 10% was probably located closer to his ass....

#3554 +(957)- [X]

<@Dark_un> is there an actual term for banks lending out money?
<@bytraper> loan
<@Dark_un> i was thinking of the process
<@incorrect> scam

#3556 +(308)- [X]

<IceHeartX> we had geekporn.com like, years ago
<IceHeartX> we gave it up 'cause we didn't actually have any hot geeks

#3557 +(213)- [X]

<mightyflo> and "what technologies do you like working with best?"
<mightyflo> that's an odd question
<redbatszu> dusteating nanobots?
<mightyflo> i should hook those up to the x10 remote
<mightyflo> i could clean the house from my chair

#3559 +(333)- [X]

<Geothermal> "<Sphlynxo> Watch your mouth, son." what the hell was that
<Geothermal> he better be joking
<Geothermal> 'cause this is fucking finalfight
<Kazz-readin> Yeah.  Fight the power!
<dregan> Where the men are men, the women are women, the sheep are scared, and the preteen girls are 40-year-old men!

#3560 +(448)- [X]

<evilbadz> can i show you my function?
<DAL9000> never on a first date.

#3561 +(349)- [X]

<mightyflo> they need to make a car washing sim
<nitrifik_> I'd play it.
<FE2work> what r u a spic ?
<blazemore> haha
<blazemore> would you like to buy a vowel?
<blazemore> or even a whole word

#3563 +(581)- [X]

<Slant> Maybe I'll be able to ignore my GOD DAMN NEED TO HUMP ANYTHING HUMAN AND FEMALE
<Slant> ANYTHING
<Zor-SLEEP> i feel for your sisters.

#3565 +(66)- [X]

<DMC[tiky]> talon: and dont get me started on your little "provicative" look in the bottom of the picture
<DMC[tiky]> look like someone put ginger ale in your vagina and you are like 'you silly little kitten'
*** DMC[tiky] was kicked by _Talon_ (God, you are so annoying)
*** DMC[tiky] (hi@pcp800792pcs.nrockv01.md.comcast.net) has joined
<DMC[tiky]> haha
<DMC[tiky]> talon is frustrated with my dmc face

#3566 +(77)- [X]

<DMC[tiky]> talon: also can we discuss your choice of hairstyles?
<DMC[tiky]> talon: the nappy-hair crackhead washed up movie star shoulder legth hair cut is sooo not in.

#3568 +(188)- [X]

<KoS-> what the hell is a civic hx?
<matts> hx =hax0red

#3570 +(1512)- [X]

*** d6|GaiaN has joined #lesbians
<d6|GaiaN> lol
<d6|GaiaN> EVERYONE OF YOU ARE GUYS AND I KNOW IT

#3572 +(297)- [X]

*** Villager has joined #akpcep
<Villager> damn AOL
<Joshua> ...
<Alexander> hi vill
<Joshua> jesus shit!
<Joshua> you ARE using AOL!
<Joshua> i thought you were joking...

#3575 +(191)- [X]

<jstepka> perl is the kryptonite of the computer science world
<pagan> if stepka looks at it his penis shrivles up
<pagan> and he gets weak
<pagan> =)
<jstepka> hell yeah

#3576 +(510)- [X]

* RedBull has returned.. I degaussed my girlfriend and I'm just not attracted to her anymore.

#3577 +(277)- [X]

<Corranfox> GF?
<metroid23> you'll get it eventually...
<Corranfox> guitar freaks
<blazemore> it's not like it'd stand for girl friend.. this IS #bemani after all

#3578 +(606)- [X]

<myzery> MIAMI -- An 81-year-old woman who arrived in court Thursday in a wheelchair plotted to smuggle 9,931 doses of Ecstasy in her luggage on a flight from London, authorities said.
<matts> hahah
<[prefix]> haha
<matts> What a doofus
<skycriesx> whered u read that
<myzery> the onion

#3579 +(267)- [X]

<Slant> The problem with having gone this long without whacking
<Slant> is that I have no quality pr0n in which to celebrate the occasion
<Slant> that now I can whack
<Slant> and thus I feel the "moment" isn't right

#3580 +(363)- [X]

<Slant> Easy way to figure out which episodes Slant likes:
<Slant> for x in StarTrek.Episodes[]
<Slant> if (x.liked_by_everyone)
<Slant> Slant.hates_episode[x] = TRUE;
<Slant> else
<Slant> Slant.likes_episode[x] = FALSE;
<Slant> no wait.
<mightyflo> hahahahahahahaha
<Slant> Slant.hates_episode[x] = FALSE;
<animegoth> lol
<FutabaAoi> so you hate all of tng!
<mightyflo> it's funny when you can debug someone's real life code

#3581 +(269)- [X]

<Slant> In the process of arguing for chinese food
<Slant> I appear to have slipped my guilt in .. err .. inability to cook food.
<Slant> If it reaches the complexity of boiling water, I don't have the attention span.
<Slant> As such, we have had a few vict.. err .. accidents around the house.
<Slant> So it looks like I'll be eating ramen tonight. Worse, I'll be eating it carefully monitored.

#3582 +(448)- [X]

<duk0r> Don't forget kids, the faster you download the bigger your penis is.

#3584 +(273)- [X]

MrProgrmmr: I want to encode my sperms DNA with the DeCSS code, that way when I jack off, I'd be breaking the law

#3587 +(341)- [X]

<cheezwiz> anybody know how to have WarCraft 3 run off of a bnetd server??
<eldee> cheezwiz: yeah
<cheezwiz> eldee
<cheezwiz> really?
<eldee> cheezwiz: yeah! first, become a beta tester. then they'll give you a serial number you can use. its hella easy after that. you just hit connect
<cheezwiz> eldee:wow u didn't help at all
<eldee> cheezwiz: cool. mission accomplished

#3588 +(351)- [X]

*** da-guvnor (~tonto@pc2-stoc4-0-cust224.mid.cable.ntl.com) Quit (If girls are made of sugar & spice......why do they taste of fish.)

#3589 +(368)- [X]

e l i t e m r p: you think you're so smart cause you go to "school"

#3591 +(310)- [X]

<Slant> ....
<FutabaAoi> i see your ... and raise you ..
<FutabaAoi> !
<Slant> four baby.
* Slant shoots FutabaAoi for cheating at the '.' table.