#4383 +(479)- [X]

<Real> I found a hooker with a heart of gold.  I TORE IT OUT AND MELTED IT DOWN FOR DRUG MONEY!

#4384 +(404)- [X]

<@JP> before i saw miss cleo's commercial, i didn't know there was a "you are attracted to a large-breasted female co-worker" card in the tarot deck.

#4389 +(232)- [X]

<Campster> "DOOM 3 WILL BE PRODUCED ON A BUDGET OF 439 DOLLARS AND A PACKET OF JUICY FRUIT"

#4392 +(191)- [X]

<Alien> Licking lead is like inviting a bunch of friends into your mouth but then cancer crashes the party

#4393 +(250)- [X]

<Rhombus> Rich fat cats hoarding sleep
<Rhombus> cheap taiwanese sleep flooding the market

#4394 +(-163)- [X]

<JustOnePepsi> I work at the walmart picture development center just to jerk off to the pics of naked babies taking baths

#4395 +(654)- [X]

<Predictable> "Peace, love, and Linux" makes me think of a guy with excessive facial hair in a tiedye t-shirt, shorts, and sandals saying "You can't use that distribution MAN" "You can't like, own an OS, MAN"

#4397 +(283)- [X]

<Sassy> if the GC ends up sucking, i will start calling it the LameCube and reap the benefits of my witticisms

#4399 +(633)- [X]

<RSN> Classrooms in Canada are actually used for teaching.. not just target shooting like our neighbours to the south..

#4400 +(655)- [X]

<GPF> Quake, Quake II, Quake III....three universes joined by one common theme....BROWN.

#4402 +(620)- [X]

<Amish> Only roaches and IBM Keyboards survive after thermo nuclear war.

#4403 +(-17)- [X]

<LesserEvil665___> LINUX IS SO EASY TO INSTALL. IT'S LIKE TAKING A SHIT AND HAS THE SAME RESULTS!!!! HAHAHAHA I AM SO WITTY!

#4407 +(343)- [X]

<EnochRoot> BREAKING NEWS: President Bush has declared a state of Boogie Madness. Preliminary operations will begin at 1100 Hours.

#4408 +(1189)- [X]

<MosServ> Katto: They will keep fighting, they think that dying in battle for their God is the greatest honor. But they also think they'll go to hell if they have pork in their stomach. Solution: Pork bullets.

#4410 +(902)- [X]

<amoeba> it's like Beverly Hills 63.217.26.3

#4411 +(649)- [X]

<Pantaloons> IT IS AN ENIGMA WRAPPED IN A CONUNDRUM WRAPPED IN A WARM FLOUR TORTILLA WITH GUACAMOLE AND SOUR CREAM.

#4414 +(452)- [X]

<SLP> I request that you allow me back in the chatroom because you have violated mIRC32 rules by kicking me out
<SLP> if you do not allow me back in the chatroom i will have an order saying that you never be allowed to use this chat program

#4415 +(643)- [X]

<MuSKraT> I'm supposed to go to meet a cute girl at a bar with our class, but I keep farting. I CAN'T GO UNTIL I FINISH FARTING.

#4416 +(362)- [X]

<ltbs> SomeGirl: you have Pantera. It's a weird strain of Anthrax. You should also watch out for Sepultura, Megadeth, and Black Sabbath

#4419 +(182)- [X]

<EnochRoot> #include pestilence.h

#4420 +(143)- [X]

<Hell_Patrol> to win the game, you must kill me... john romero

#4421 +(277)- [X]

<moira> yoinkster is like the humpback of notre dame cathedral, except no humpback, and it's the ogg vorbis cathedral, and he keeps ringing the bells yelling unintelligible things about how ogg owns your mom

#4422 +(405)- [X]

<moira> I converted an MP3 to ogg, then back again, and then back and forth between MP3 and OGG format thirty times, and when I listened to it after that, it was just an mp3 of you guys talking

#4424 +(559)- [X]

<amoeba> it's a little known fact that the binary releases aren't actually compiled by anyone, they just mysteriously appear on the FTP site packaged and ready for release.. it's postulated that the Devil himself uses Mozilla, and in return for using it he takes care of the insane build requirements

#4427 +(1099)- [X]

<Euri> I am not going to scan a ferret.

#4428 +(521)- [X]

<happy> the neat thing about java is that it's so slow

#4429 +(229)- [X]

<tr0n> I want a brazil renderfarm licence. =(
<EvilKosh> AND ALSO A REGULAR FARM WITH SEXY TEEN SLUTS WHO GET IT ON WITH FARM ANIMALS

#4440 +(51)- [X]

<Psylent> looks like I've got what it takes to climb the IRC social ladder

#4441 +(1343)- [X]

<Euri> They should make an idiot mode. Whenever you try to alter something you shouldn't, a big smily shiny thing would come out of the computer and momentarily distract the silly person doing something naughty, and the computer would then pick itself up and fly out the window to safety.

#4442 +(826)- [X]

<amit> there was a girl in my english class who had a lord of the rings bookmark. she looked at me, then at the bookmark and said "Bilbo's so hot!" and put it in the cleavage between her breasts.

#4443 +(238)- [X]

<Mr_X> THE US GOVERNMENT WILL PROVIDE YOU A NEW SPACEBAR, SO YOU CAN WRITE PATRIOTIC EMAILS TO YOUR FRIENDS IN EUROPE.

#4444 +(175)- [X]

<moira> reading my cds with a laser pointer, while the whole time I could have been using a mac that can run iTunes

#4445 +(226)- [X]

<K0ffing> you should Photoshop Raz ... I'll give you a dollar if you can make his face look less like a butt

#4447 +(804)- [X]

<Idioteq> shit.. the zombie processes have gone chaotic on my pull parity
<happy> flip the bits, STAT
<Yoinkster> you should also vi the slackware
<thirtyseven|IGOTHEADTODAY> I get the idea that you guys might be making this shit up.

#4448 +(200)- [X]

<tr0n> HINT FOR THE RETARDED: BOX MODELERS SELDOM MODEL BOXES.

#4449 +(248)- [X]

<the_hydra> I got a hemorroid once and used Preparation H's little "anal applicator" and didn't think it was really worth it. I think they just included that as a joke.

#4450 +(322)- [X]

<Alien> I believe our girls' softball team had something about them never being loose or something on their shirts ... they misspelled lose with HILARIOUS RESULTS.

#4451 +(87)- [X]

<amoeba> mouse gestures = OMG IM TOO LAZY TO PRESS TEH BUTTONS ON TEH KEYBOARD
<@tr0n> HEY IF I MOVE IT IN AN S PATTERN AND THEN A ZIGZAG AND THEN A SQUARE SHAPE IT WILL TAKE ME TO FAGS.NET

#4455 +(369)- [X]

<Nephil> I was given detention because I said "evaginate" during a debate
<Nephil> :/

#4456 +(964)- [X]

<HailBrak> me: "we should form a company that makes manly china patterns"
<HailBrak> my friend: "i agree. i mean, how much success am i supposed to have when all the patterns are called "tender blossom" or some shit? i want one called, like, "Glock" or "Beer and Tits" or "Lets Burn Down Fucking Pier 1"

#4457 +(423)- [X]

<phubuh> WHY THE HELL DO PEOPLE DO THIS
<phubuh> I JUST DOWNLOADED SoF2 AND IT WAS BLACK&WHITE
<phubuh> OH I KNOW I'LL NAME IS SOF2 SO MORE PEOPLE DOWNLOAD FROM ME AND USE MY BANDWITH OR HEY WAIT A MINUTE
<Katana> I tried downloading Harry Potter and got Ancient Secrets of Asian Sex

#4460 +(1467)- [X]

<jre> One time I went into a stupid donut shop to take a pee-pee.  They had a sign that said: PLEASE "FLUSH TOILET" BEFORE LEAVING.  Flush toilet was in parentheses.  So I assumed it was code for something
<jre> So I "pissed in the sink"

#4470 +(47)- [X]

<[Prae|Code]> As it stands, AvDom is a levelless, XPless, HPless, MPless, Classless game system
<[Prae|Code]> and it is only that way because it was designed that way ^_^ <the_Speed_Bump> Sounds intricate.

#4471 +(318)- [X]

<the_Speed_Bump> I can't imagine a conversation that covers both philosophy and shit without being terribly disjointed.
<the_Speed_Bump> "So, what do you think of God?" "I just took the hugest shit ever!"

#4472 +(933)- [X]

<the_Speed_Bump> I have a severe, irrational phobia against midgets with red hair who wear black trenchcoats and sell kitchen cleaners in back alleys behind hotels whose names start with the letter 'U'.
<the_Speed_Bump> Every day is a struggle.

#4474 +(-153)- [X]

<resident> Africa is a mix of clit-choppin' negroes, godforsaken deserts, and maneating plants.

#4476 +(493)- [X]

<Dreq> is there anyway to get the DOS version?
<andy> the dos version of win98?
<Dreq> yes

#4478 +(646)- [X]

<tatsumi> There's a difference between being grumpy and hating every little fucker in existence.

#4479 +(1012)- [X]

<Khross> andy, time for the secret unix decoder handshake.
* andy sodomizes Khross
* Khross orgasms
<Khross> Okay, we can start the meeting.

#4481 +(89)- [X]

*** Pope (faykdogpo@AC9654C3.ipt.aol.com) has joined #Sphere
<Khross> Raped any children lately?