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#246 +(504)- [X]

e l i t e m r p: first type this
CD WINDOWSCOMMAND
n e r d b 5: i dont have a cd in the cdrom

#2112 +(25)- [X]

<moomba> i heard that a company called nissan was coming with a Z type thing
<moomba> but that's not out yet
<moomba> it's supposedly really fast but only has 2 seats

#2278 +(83)- [X]

<daisu> [23:05] <@Schrieks> and i don't relate to japanese guys in pr0n
<daisu> [23:05] <@Schrieks> their willies are tiny
<daisu> This is so garrishly true
<daisu> I think that's why there are so many asian people
<daisu> sperm has less length to travel

#3111 +(1152)- [X]

(Brodie) If I go see a doctor and tell him I can't maintain an erection, will he give me Viagra?
(Brodie) I need viagra for my paln
(Samadhi) He may check you though
(Samadhi) Like give you a HJ to make sure you're telling the truth
(Brodie) Sweet
(Brodie) This is win win

#4205 +(220)- [X]

<Lepper> if you pierce your rectum like 5 times, your poop would make weird shapes
<Lepper> like star shaped

#6442 +(248)- [X]

<redhook> <--- 22
<redhook> and I got a 7 year old on my nuts, how pathetic
<redhook> s/7/17/
<redhook> that looked bad

#6518 +(1780)- [X]

<QJ> your grandma opened the shower door
<QJ> while you were wanking?
<knox> yep
<knox> it was worse than that
<QJ> she finished you off?

#6980 +(161)- [X]

<chococat44> you just cant keep a good man down
<greg> Conversly, you can't keep a bad man up.

#7893 +(425)- [X]

<+iNzpekth|buzy> where can i get some ftp programs??
<@pain> try www.google.com
<+iNzpekth|buzy> <<--Thx pain-->>
<@pain> lol, nice script
<+iNzpekth|buzy> <<--Thx pain-->>
<+iNzpekth|buzy> hey pain, i didnt find ftp from www.google.com, which link is it?
* pain cries

#8667 +(325)- [X]

<cryterion> that the girl had a nickname.
<cryterion> "mouse"
<cryterion> have you ever stepped on a mouse's tail?
<cryterion> and heard it squeak?
<cryterion> this girl did that at the point of orgasm.
<cryterion> "EEEEEEEEEEEE!

#14277 +(153)- [X]

<nihil-_> she's about as darling as waking up in the morning with another mans semen all over my face

#14648 +(17)- [X]

<pandz>the computer guy at the store told me to flash my bios...i says to him flash this...

#21756 +(425)- [X]

<Stiffler> How's it going.
<FlyNavy> eh
<FlyNavy> been better
<FlyNavy> pretty much out of resin to smoke...
<FlyNavy> and I still don't have:
<FlyNavy> a job
<FlyNavy> a car
<FlyNavy> money
<FlyNavy> weed
<FlyNavy> or pussy
<Stiffler> So basically...
<Stiffler> It's all the same.
<Stiffler> ROFL
<FlyNavy> I need a job so I can get a car so I can have money to buy weed
<FlyNavy> which I'll then use to get pussy
<Stiffler> Indeed
<FlyNavy> which'll then need to be maintained by a job
<FlyNavy> which to get I'll need a car
<FlyNavy> and for that I need money
<Stiffler> But you see, you first need the pussy to get the weed to get the money to get the car to the job..
<FlyNavy> so I could try selling weed
<FlyNavy> :D
<FlyNavy> exactly...if I had some pussy, she could tell me where to get weed to I could sell it to buy a car to get a job to maintin the pussy that I'll get with weed which I'll buy with money left over from buying a car that I earned at my job
<Stiffler> Indeed

#29379 +(328)- [X]

<@Pumiliocumfustis> these speakers have so much bass
<@qrg> how do they fit fish in such small boxes

#33590 +(200)- [X]

<TigerSun> bhahahahahahaha
<TigerSun> article on k5
<TigerSun> "setting a cookie is very simple"
<TigerSun> <INSERT 150 LINES OF C CODE>

#33614 +(110)- [X]

* enwhysea can't wait for the war with iraq
<MamlaCat> enwhy it will never happen
<enwhysea> That might be the reason i can't actually wait for it.

#33678 +(125)- [X]

<+Link-> <skitzm> i have a serious prob with my quake 3 please helP!
<+Link-> why do people instintively pm me for help on q3?
<+Link-> i have a serious problem with my q3 as well
<+Link-> it sucks.

#33688 +(34)- [X]

<acidkick> the kids at my school are so gay
<Spitz[busy]> you should feel at home then

#38380 +(493)- [X]

<Argent-> Call a few adoption agencies asking for a hot 17 year-old girl with a birthday coming up, and they start with the suppoenas.

#40533 +(116)- [X]

<Miss^Katie> whats the kinkiest thing you've ever done
<rachhh> well before i had my first bisexual experience, i was smoking pot, and my boyfriend was licking me out and then he got my dog and my dog was licking me
<Miss^Katie> what was that like?
<rachhh> it was really good
<rachhh> i dont think i would have done it if i knew about it though
<rachhh> you ever done anything like that?
<Miss^Katie> ummm not with animals

#44029 +(106)- [X]

<Mars_Alien> okey wat am i missing
<Gandalf> your h key?
--> jennings1 (jirc@vic-dial-196-31-177-46.mweb.co.za) has joined #Highveld
<Mars_Alien> gulo jennings1

#45037 +(18)- [X]

<@WSBN-MeBaD> Why doesn't Osama bin Laden have sex with his five wives?
<@WSBN-MeBaD> Because every time he spreads their legs he sees Bush.

#48183 +(322)- [X]

<eyeball> you know you're a geek when you run your webcam software to see what you look like instead of going to the bathroom mirror

#51990 +(131)- [X]

< gimbgoth> Fatal-Err: yeah, that's a bummer huh
< Fatal-Err> bummer? what means bummer?
<+insight> damn
<+Moak> it's fuck in the "okay-to-say-at-mom's-table" version

#55463 +(346)- [X]

<sean> wow
<sean> that fart was gross
<sean> sounded like an elephant got shot

#55918 +(154)- [X]

<Koobze> hiii
<Koobze> I'm kind of angry at my friends... I paid the $50 for the hair bleach and dye, since one or two of them were supposed to join me and split the cost, and yet they're not and I'm stuck with all that cost.
<Fat-Burrick> and gay hair
<Koobze> hheh
<Koobze> yeah, it's pretty gay
<Koobze> just adds insult to injury

#75781 +(297)- [X]

* Volt9000 gazes through binoculars at DopefishJustin "And here we have the nerd, in his natural habitat, the Star Trek convention. Notice his pale skin and thick glasses, typical of the species nerdius nevergonnagetlaidius."

#79896 +(268)- [X]

(bovril): i realised yesterday
(bovril): that every old lady you walk past in the street probably fancies you
(bovril): :(
(doggie^): yeah
(doggie^): one was checking me out in marks and spencers the other week
(doggie^): then she licked her lips at me
(doggie^): i was weirded out for days
(bovril): if thats not a strong argument for euthenasia i dont know what is

#101268 +(708)- [X]

<Abstruse> I personally like graveyard shifts better...I'm a night owl by nature...
<Abstruse> Besides, the morning shift there is 6 AM to 2 PM...those are the hours I'm usually sleeping.
<phoxleep> 6 AM
<phoxleep> wtf is 6 AM
* phoxleep has never seen 6 AM
<Abstruse> phox: 6 AM = bedtime.  You know, when that big lamp outside the window starts to turn on?  You DO know about the Big Room outside the house, right?
<Abstruse> phox: You know, the Big Room you go to when you have to go buy more food and stuff?
<phoxleep> the big room is sorta cool
<phoxleep> but doom 3 has better shaders damnit
<Abstruse> I hate the big room when the lamp's on...
<jastity> Abstruse: I have my groceries delivered to my Big Room, I order them online.
<Abstruse> They need to fix the air conditioner out there.
<Abstruse> jastity: I meant McDonalds.
<Abstruse> Or Taco Bell or Jack in the Box or whatever.
<phoxleep> Abstruse: why hasn't greenpeace given them shit about leaving it on?
<phoxleep> it's a waste of power damnit
<Abstruse> phox: Something about it using solar energy I think.

#105433 +(843)- [X]

<kommy> j/oin #horsesex

#115626 +(574)- [X]

<Lailoken> On Cinemax tonight they're showing Shrek from 11:00 to 12:30 and then Best Sex Ever from 12:30 to 1:00.
<Lailoken> Somewhere in America parents leave their child to go to a dinner party, "Here honey, you just watch Shrek and we'll be home some time after midnight."

#115997 +(143)- [X]

<virt> i'm a musician. of course i hate HHC. you can't like it unless you are a) a candy raver, b) a candy raver, c) a candyraver, and possibly d) tone deaf and epileptic - and/or german

#138434 +(5)- [X]

<Credence> how is an athlon even remotely comparable to a celeron
<Aeturnus> they're pretty close in speed

#138450 +(115)- [X]

<[Hobbes]> -rw-------    1 hobbes  hobbes  7802880 Aug 20 07:03 metaballs.core
<[Hobbes]> wtf is THAT
<@dk> your metaballs dumped thier core? ;)
<[Hobbes]> heh I read it as meatballs the first time
<@ky_druid> damn Hobbes, do you have to use your metaballs so hard that they coredump? sheesh.

#291648 +(675)- [X]

<icekickr> i think i made my mom wonder why she ever had me
<icekickr> she told me she was going to a couples shower
<icekickr> so i said, "oh a gangbang"
<icekickr> i guess its times like that

#348528 +(316)- [X]

<sd> my mom got pissed at me today
<sd> I was wearing the "the axe effect" and it must have turned her on, because she told me to leave the room and stay away from her =/

#439958 +(1746)- [X]

<FuzLogic> I never did figure out how to open the damn doors on the landing boats.
<mirth> "how i survived normandy" by FuzLogic

#449563 +(42)- [X]

<mushashi>So I was with my girlfriend, right. I was looking at her face, but all I was thinking was mmm, Opeteron...

#449626 +(1281)- [X]

<Oceandream9>  On another note, they should create a word that doesn't mean horny, but just having the urge to cuddle.
<Oceandream9>  Yeah, there's cuddly, but that's more of an adjective. I want the actual yearning to cuddle to become a word.
<Oceandream9>  Can anybody think of one?
<Combat_taco>  cundry
<Thunder_cunt>  Cuddlesome?
<Unpleasantries>  snugglish
<Sm0t>  “FEMALE”

#539388 +(1043)- [X]

NitishP |  Wow this Perl tutorial can be lame - "recursion n.: See recursion."

#618717 +(490)- [X]

<C@^^31> data mining is a lucrative business, my uncle founded Datatown over near Silicon Valley back in '49
<C@^^31> died of the 01001lung

#627287 +(612)- [X]

<NG-Buddhist> I found something humorously racist on Friday
<NG-Buddhist> I was reading a magazine from my English room after my exam, about the most influential people of the last 50 years
<NG-Buddhist> and various pictures were cut out, but i didnt think about it
<NG-Buddhist> then i got to the back of the book, and someone glued in Rosa Park's picture of her sitting there
<Marcus-> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

#632087 +(898)- [X]

<sceadu> i really need to figure out how to use a debugger in emacs
<iank> pfft, how could you *not* know?
<iank> It's just ctrl+alt+meta+f7+numlock+c+e+m+<
<iank> Hell, you could discover that by accident in emacs..

#655055 +(990)- [X]

<Heiler> I feel stupid asking this, but how many pints are in a cup?
<Swinky> it depends on how big the cup is
<Heiler> Thanks, suddenly I don't feel so stupid.

#656592 +(467)- [X]

MightyMooquack> Huh. This is something I've not seen in C code before...
Iconoplast> comments?
Iconoplast> HA HA HA BURN

#713125 +(-331)- [X]

Mark1: yeh my house is emo
Mark1: it cuts its walls

#715093 +(1334)- [X]

MrHahn2265: she is my sister
MrHahn2265: words really cant descibe her
MrHahn2265: although I can attempt to describe her through massive bangings on the keyboard
MrHahn2265: l.kjnfvgfg8ifgudfbpoicxv'lk
MrHahn2265: woops i opened paint

#770965 +(1099)- [X]

<@G3_> Half of all adults in the United States say they have registered as an organ donor, although only some have purchased a motorcycle to show that they're really serious about it.

#835023 +(-250)- [X]

<Ceru> when my sister went to the hospital, the bill was $11,000
<Ceru> the insurance company had a major fit
<R3mix> what did she go there for? O_o
<Ceru> she drowned

#881704 +(1096)- [X]

<Dr_Memory> I think there's a real argument to be made here that using RAID for home data storage is putting effort into the wrong end of the problem.
<Dr_Memory> when you can buy 2TB disks off the shelf, it's probably substantially simpler to just buy two of them, set up a good backup system, and reap the day-to-day simplicity benefits of one controller -> one disk -> one filesystem.
<Dr_Memory> or to put it another way: your kitten photos do not need the same high-availabity system infrastructure as Citibank's transaction databases :)
<topaz> I CAN HAS FIEV NIENS?

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