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#557 +(337)- [X] [23:34] [+xvize] c++ is made in borland
#3630 +(6678)- [X] <blazemore> omg i love this song
<blazemore> Now playing: Unknown Artist - Track 2 @ 128 Kbps. (0:47/3:24)
<Javi> blazemore: yeah, that's a bad ass song
#4602 +(3335)- [X] <FreshBrew> IM DONT MATH FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
<FreshBrew> HELL FUCKING YES
<kolby> you still in english?
#4750 +(295)- [X] <RD_> i miss those good ol days, no woman, no money, only games, chatting, and lots of masterbation
#6633 +(399)- [X] doubting: interesting
doubting: popup ad suggests I use www.blackjack.com to backup my critical data
doubting: strangely, I'm not wont to gamble with my backups
#11237 +(719)- [X] <Lord_Igsel> i remember an 11 year old kid on irc once, he had 'found out' about masturbation, and we were all laughing at him and things like "wooww what's it like how did you do itt' and then he said 'a friend showed me. i rubbed his dick, he rubbed mine.'
<Lord_Igsel> and then we got scared. :D
#11416 +(128)- [X] <NOCKY> OMFG
<NOCKY> I JUST WENT TO GET THINGI PRINTED OUT
<NOCKY> AT THE COLOR PRINTER
<NOCKY> AND SOMEONE ELSE PRINTED
<NOCKY> A CHUCK E CHEESE COUPON
<NOCKY> AND BETTER YET IT WAS ALL PIXELLATED AND SHITTLY LOOKING
<wolfwork> astounding
#12082 +(151)- [X] <punkgurl> I usta be scared of the dick, now I grab a hold of it and handle it like a real bitch
#12317 +(444)- [X] <gorilla> ANY GIRLS HERE
<Lan> yeah, wanna cyber?
<gorilla> YES
<gorilla> HOW
<Lan> sorta like this
* gorilla (gorilla@xxx.ipt.aol.com) Quit (Connection reset by peer)
<Lan> a little to the left
#14716 +(147)- [X] <eden2> t_r: heh, patrick and i went and saw star wars last night......and i saw the WHOLE thing this time
<eden2> ...the whole movie, that is
#17205 +(928)- [X] <Funk> Hey I have a question for your mother
<zuKi> Sure thing, let me get her!
<Funk> Ask her how many Communion wafers you'd have to eat to consume a whole Jesus
#17679 +(285)- [X] <azzl> i can getcha a cheap bmw.
<azzl> or mercedes, ya like-a the mercedes?
<azzl> there's just a little scratch on it.
<azzl> where the vin's supposed to be.
<azzl> i wouldn't worry about it.
#17728 +(274)- [X] <Doggy^666> i have just been mentally scarred
<Doggy^666> im never gunna look in my mothers underwear drawer again
#22085 +(539)- [X] Captain: well that is half true, the environment is a problem, and recycling does help but so does killing fascists yeah
Captain: so i say why stop at one
Captain: do both
panckreous: but killing fascists gets you arrested for.... whats the charge called
panckreous: oh ya
panckreous: assassinating the president
#22362 +(111)- [X]
#26586 +(550)- [X] Kid1: What are you, illiterate?
Teacher: Hey, we dont talk about illiterate people.
Kid2: Yea, we write about them.
#31759 +(576)- [X] essiah00Guy: I can't stand your fuckery.
jass10816: lol
jass10816: my mom is standing right behind me
jass10816: good one
Messiah00Guy: THE DRUGS YOU ORDERED
Messiah00Guy: ARE ON THEIR WAY
Messiah00Guy: GG
jass10816: im going to get you
Messiah00Guy: From behind?
#31891 +(184)- [X] <tester> what did I miss?
<maklic> well
<maklic> i was just fucking AdrameleK's momma
<maklic> other than that nothing much
<tester> send the log
#33784 +(172)- [X] *** Joins: ph30tu5 (~ihateyoug@user-0cal658.cable.mindspring.com)
*** Joins: ReadingZu (~RZ@user-0cal658.cable.mindspring.com)
<ReadingZu> oh... wait
<ReadingZu> hey wait
<ReadingZu> i can be an ass all i want and you cant ban me without banning her
<ReadingZu> HAHHADFH@Q$%&
<ReadingZu> OEND
*** c-rOCK sets mode: +b *!~RZ@user-0cal658.cable.mindspring.com
*** ReadingZu was kicked by c-rOCK (banned.)
#36505 +(265)- [X] <reb> im gonna go eat some cocks
<reb> i mean foood
<reb> SHIT
#36875 +(247)- [X] <Hiro> I go to get a nectarine to eat
<Hiro> I discover all twelve have melted and merged together into a large fluffy animal
<Hiro> It tried to eat me! <=O
#49486 +(229)- [X] <cranky-> pagan: I just catch her when she's not looking
<cranky-> I'll buy her dinner first so it's not rape
<KK-> its just buying sex then
<cranky-> what do you think marriage really is?
<cranky-> it's long term financing on a piece of ass
<_overkill> WORD
#50385 +(432)- [X] <gerrard> siiiiigh
<gerrard> nothing like sitting around in your boxers at 4 am
<gerrard> mouse in one hand
<gerrard> can of mountain dew in the other
<}Phoenix{> dick in your mouth
<gerrard> ya..
<gerrard> hey wait
#50869 +(78)- [X] <Ne0_Rat> we all know who the bitch is in the geek relationships... whoever has the worse computer ;) J/K
#51204 +(-92)- [X] <Autumnn> Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
#52980 +(266)- [X] <Bodom83> dir NEW KORN SLIPKNOT DVDS!!
<Nvrmr> cd wrong window
<Nvrmr> dir
<Nvrmr> get dumbass.txt
#54134 +(208)- [X] <Kalony> i thought it was some cool hand of fate deal or something
<dredg> fate needs to deal me a sandwich
<Kalony> fate could deal me a hand job too
<Kalony> preferably after washing its hands
<dredg> and then washing its hands before it made my sandwich
#56120 +(157)- [X] G3nki: my printer is printing subliminal messages on my paper
Keerax: ...o_O
G3nki: it's printing out "Join the Military!"
G3nki: like cutting half of it at the top of the page
Keerax: yvan eht nioj
G3nki: never!
#71997 +(201)- [X] <Slicer> Its funny how the thought of sucking on a wet sock makes me feel sick to my stomach
<Slicer> and the thought of sucking on a dick, disturbingly enough, doesn't.
<Red> ...
#75988 +(174)- [X] <PuffinFreshWog> when people call me fat, i grab my man boobs and jiggle then around a bit
#80049 +(220)- [X] * dasunt has his 12-step plan: 'How to Achieve Sex If You Are A Geek'
<dasunt> 1) Convert to homosexuality.
<dasunt> 2) Find another geek who has also followed this plan.
<zoo> it's that easy?
* pig has a 1-step plan
<dasunt> 3..12) Give money to Dasunt.
<pig> 1) stop being a fucking geek
#84803 +(1876)- [X] Reelr123: whats up
k8 z swimmer: who are you?
Reelr123: you dont remember?
k8 z swimmer: nope
Reelr123: i m bummed
k8 z swimmer: clay?
Reelr123: nope
k8 z swimmer: ooool
k8 z swimmer: k
k8 z swimmer: so who the heck are ya
Reelr123: its me
Reelr123: guess
Reelr123: i have admired you for a long time
k8zswimmer: Who are you?
Reelr123: i have known u for a long time
k8zswimmer: way to freak me out yo
Reelr123: I love you more then the world
k8zswimmer: tmi.... WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!?!
Reelr123: I know exactly what u r doing as we speak. And you better get to bed right this instant
Reelr123: or u r grounded from the computer
k8zswimmer: MOM?!?
#86224 +(462)- [X] <Dirtbiker> howd all of u learn how to do this crap?
<@nomis> hit f1
<@nomis> frequently
<Dirtbiker> in here?
<@nomis> in flash
<Dirtbiker> but thats the shortcut to help
#86228 +(285)- [X] <ksennin> "Do the girls have to shave their asses?"
<ksennin> [x] Yes
<ksennin> [ ] Yes
<FT> ksennin: Your definition of 'great' tends to be weird.
<TripleRach> Shave, what
<FT> Try "Shake"
<ksennin> Oh shit.
<ksennin> Yes, "Shake"
#118055 +(362)- [X] <s_> my brother put signs up where the bathrooms are
<s_> because i pissed in the hallway last night
#193399 +(236)- [X] <SumGeye> I met God once.
<Bern> Ok...
<SumGeye> Yeah. He was on the same bus as me. He smelt like whiskey.
#252577 +(463)- [X] <Shinitenshi> "No entry found for faces."
<Shinitenshi> "Did you mean feces?"
<Shinitenshi> Fucking thesarus.com.
#259320 +(726)- [X] <helv> WHAT THE FUCK
<helv> a giant mini egg just drove past my house
#315042 +(3349)- [X] <sexor> I went shopping last night at like 1am. the place was empty, and this old woman, just making polite convertation, said to me: "where is everyone??".
<sexor> I replied: "In bed, same place you and I should be!"
<sexor> Took me ten minutes to figure out why she gave me a dirty look
#367755 +(1428)- [X] <SPLURGE> bitch tells me i got a drinkin problem
<SPLURGE> i tell her she has an ugly problem and im tryin to make it less obvious
<SPLURGE> we dont get along so well after that
#367884 +(697)- [X] (+sok|puppet): i loves my cereal
(+Harri): i'm hungry
(@Zaphod): Yeah, cherios should be just about the right size for you to 'love' as much as you want
(+Harri): now i'm not
#373292 +(943)- [X] Psychosis555: Dude who's that hot chick in the picture with you?
Psychosis555: The one with the nice tits
Jorden666 Sxe: Dude thats my sister!!
Psychosis555: So?
Psychosis555: I'm not related to her
Jorden666 Sxe: Dude she's 4!!!
Psychosis555: I stand by what I said
#378883 +(1233)- [X] <Underscore> /part and /quit are sitting on a boat, they weigh a total of 120kg, the moon is at waxing crescent and it is 12 degrees C outside. How much marzipan can a giraffe eat in 10 minutes?
#428566 +(1897)- [X] <peer> Bad timing is when you are running late and you get all the red lights
<+FyreDaug> Nah, bad timing is what happened yesterday
<+FyreDaug> One of my girl friends was over and she asked me to do something and I was doing something on my computer already so I said "just gimmie another sec"
<+FyreDaug> and shes like "aw cmon I've given you lots of secs already!"
<+FyreDaug> as my mom was walking upstairs where the computer room is. She just looked at me funny and walked away
#455441 +(957)- [X] <BoTGoD> In the wet season, when my house lies at the eye of a particularly savage thunderstorm storm, lightning all around and power out, i like to masturbate - it makes me feel like i am thor.
#630110 +(1630)- [X] <puertoroo> so, i was at the store and the hot female clerk was checking me out and stuff
<puertoroo> then we came back to my place and tore my bedroom up
<puertoroo> then we did it on the stove and then on the washing machine
<HuhWhat> And in the real world, what happened?
<puertoroo> ....i never even made it to the store :(
#632906 +(3708)- [X] <bloodmaster> this guy keeps sending me notices, how do i send them back?????
<`Trust`> ./notice <nick> <message>
<bloodmaster> ty!
<bloodmaster> ./notice <Tommyboy872> <hello tommy, my name is john i am from michigan im 16! Im 5 foot 11 inch tall, you sound cute n we should talk more often ok??>
#717290 +(1805)- [X] <@Headknocker> what happens when 5 emos sit in a square room?
<@Headknocker> one dies because he has no corner to cry in :D
#722053 +(667)- [X] < Vice> if paris hilton came and wanted sex.. i think i just might have
to concede..
< Vice> cos you never know
< Vice> she might have one of those "the millionth customer gets a special prize" campaigne going on..
#759772 +(261)- [X] Informatik: My final iMac price ended up at $3,752
Informatik: xd
Motley: the hell did you add? a used car?
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