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#1012 +(561)- [X]

<@neoblaze> I fell over in a heterosexual fashion

#1186 +(85)- [X]

<chick> sparks makes me heppy :)
<chick> I mean HEMPY :p

#1658 +(519)- [X]

<bigPIMP> are you a virgin?
<kink> yes
<kink> giving it up to a non-linux using chick is like giving it up to a man, just wrong

#2034 +(558)- [X]

<Brentai> ...you guys realize that this is the least I've ever laughed.  I'm anti-laughing.
<FoxieMoxie> You're anti-laughing? Good, I hope your lungs implode then.

#2178 +(101)- [X]

<KidHype> <Razoola> Honey, they are picking on me again on the rg boards
<KidHype> <Razoolas wife> Well i never...i will tell them how awesome you are and that will show them
<KidHype> <Razoola> thanks hun, you rock *sniff*

#2538 +(3209)- [X]

<Bizzy> say Y
<DAL9000> Y
<DAL9000> easy to say
<DAL9000> f00
<DAL9000>
<DAL9000> say that.
<Bizzy>
<DAL9000>
<DAL9000> now that
<Bizzy>
<DAL9000> now say this:
<DAL9000> |ZZ | е/\/\ߪ
<Bizzy> |ZZ | е/\/\ߪ
<DAL9000> bahahaha
<Bizzy> what?
<Bizzy> damnit

#2708 +(1044)- [X]

(ashke) id like to take someone from the 1950s
(ashke) like some 15 year old kid
(ashke) and show him the internet
(ashke) "GOLLY GEE LOOK AT THAT DONKEY HAVE SEX WITH THAT LADY"

#2757 +(529)- [X]

*** Now talking in #honda
*** Topic is '<xessor> anyone know how to make fire come out the tailpipe?'

#2998 +(711)- [X]

<dboo> shit...i can hear the cat masturbating again

#6190 +(711)- [X]

<cyn> what the fuck do you need dual gf3's for
<n2deep> cause i want dual monitors
<cyn> how are you gunna fit two AGP cards in one box?
<n2deep> uhm
<n2deep> FUC
<n2deep> FUCK FUCKF

#6592 +(75)- [X]

<desaster> why get a gf when i have volvo
<montz> yeah a volvo has enuf of holes

#7701 +(1343)- [X]

<Ludwigvan> haha you can't kick me
<bobthecow> oi someone op me
<Felix1> bob type alt-f4
<Ludwigvan> hehe
*** bobthecow has quit IRC (Leaving)
<Ludwigvan> HAHAHAHAHAHAH SHE FELL FOR IT!!!!!!!!
<Ludwigvan> HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAA
<Astro}> oh my god ...
<Felix1> :D
<Felix1> oops :p
*** bobthecow has joined #buttermenthol
<bobthecow> err
<Ludwigvan> ahahahahahhahaha ---> bob
<Astroy}> hahaha you idiot bob
<Felix1> sorry bob :D
<bobthecow> my dad was looking over my shoulder and even he laughed

#8691 +(222)- [X]

<^_^Sasha^_^> im unzipping ma pant
<Nikki21[woaHOTTY]> wait a second
<Nikki21[woaHOTTY]> Does Allah know you are fucking an american?
<^_^Sasha^_^> yeah he knows everything
<^_^Sasha^_^> He
<Nikki21[woaHOTTY]> so is he cool with it?
<^_^Sasha^_^> no:|
<Nikki21[woaHOTTY]> oh, so do u want 2 stop? allah might get mad
No such nick/channel
Session Close: Sat Jun 08 02:05:24 2002

#10280 +(1738)- [X]

<Jesse> hello, I am Jesse, male, 28 years old, caucasian, and am looking for friends to chat with. I hope to see you online
<Amanda`> I HOPE TO SEE YOU FACE-DOWN IN A QUAGMIRE WITH A NINE IRON LODGED BETWEEN YOUR SHOULDER BLADES

#11038 +(419)- [X]

<@AniDean> THIS FREAK NAMED NICKSERV KEEPS ASKING ME FOR MY PASSWORD
<+darkmind> Report him :x
<+darkmind> Or try to flood him off

#12318 +(6290)- [X]

* @Lan plays with his privates.
<Rintaun> ...
<@Lan> I got these new toy soldiers
<@Lan> They are really neat

#13725 +(86)- [X]

<_emma_> I'm just like a Barbie doll, I come with all the accesories <Mort-Hog> And you have your underwear melted on to you? :)
<_emma_> Barbies in my day had no underwear
<Mort-Hog> What? My barbies all have their plastic underwear molded on to their bodies

#14530 +(683)- [X]

*** Darth-Phenom is now known as Guest38697
*** Sopabuena is now known as Guest21415
*** TheRealMatt is now known as Guest60273
*** Whitney is now known as Guest15303
<Flirbnic> Hey, cool. The sum of all the Guest numbers that just occurred in here, divided by 8, equals 16961.
<Flirbnic> $calc((15303+60273+38697+21415)/8)
<Flirbnic> ...
<Flirbnic> I have no life.
<TheRealMatt> no... no you don't

#16291 +(201)- [X]

<Zimbu> i was just using common sense, sorry
<Gimik\HMWRK> Zimbu: try to use something you have next time ;)

#20891 +(664)- [X]

<Fraud> hehe ill never forget in math class in high school back in the day, 2 negros get in a fight and one stabs the other with a screw driver right in front of me when im like a freshman, then some black girls stands up and screams OH SHEET HE STABBED CORNBREAD

#21860 +(477)- [X]

<McCheese> Under da sea...
<McCheese> Hi McCheese, how ya doin?
McCheese (McCheese@e43712c2.res.east.36f5c1fe.net.hmsk) is now known as Bobbie
<Bobbie> I'm doing fine
Bobbie (McCheese@e43712c2.res.east.36f5c1fe.net.hmsk) is now known as McCheese
<McCheese> oh shit, I screwed that up :)
<McCheese> BAH, I mean :(
<@Technogeek> Get help.

#25544 +(201)- [X]

<GetLinux> I wrote a mem eater and i'm running it, starting winME's system monitor now
<The-Bus> GetLinux: You wrote MS Office??

#32981 +(197)- [X]

<Adonai> but the sex toy shop guy might think i'm crazy buying like 15 dildos
<Alyssa^eating> wth...
<Alyssa^eating> I just get back and I see that
<Adonai> so what's the lesson you learned today Alyssa?
<Alyssa^eating> I'm not sure
<Adonai> don't come back to IRC ;oD

#36175 +(145)- [X]

<Joesomebo> but can I operate under a different IP address that's not being used for example? Or is that the type of thing they only do in movies

#36684 +(233)- [X]

<[Banned-H]G-Daddy>no, see, do a threesome 2guys/1girl... so you have the bigger dick (gotta take a chance) and she'll ignore him.. so you can do his boyfriend with him watching :)
<Claus> woah there G!
<Isajeep> rofl
<Claus> "so you can do his boyfriend with him watching"
<Isajeep> I don't call him Gay-Daddy for nothing
<[Banned-H]G-Daddy> er.. her her her
<[Banned-H]G-Daddy> jesus... what am I thinking

#37531 +(371)- [X]

<calif> dude i definatly spend too much time on irc, lol
<Marl3y> yeah, at around 10 last night I went downstairs to get something to eat, and my mom was in the kitchen and goes ... "whoa, you still live here?"

#38966 +(175)- [X]

<PsychicSeagull> I should make a book - Procrastination for Dummies!  It will just be a bunch of empty pages.

#40380 +(233)- [X]

<Zeuxy> I have to take all the dead small children out of my walls.
<Zeuxy> Cable guy's coming on monday.
<Kayin> Zeuxy: so you're a pedonecrophiliac?
<Zeuxy> Kayin: I never said I fucked them.
<Zeuxy> .. well.. just the chicks
<Zeuxy> But usually while they're alive
<astral> 'usually.'

#41882 +(357)- [X]

<@Dza> you g/f's so fat her pic is ~3 megs?

#43191 +(4)- [X]

<bobthedinosaur> umm
<The_StarWarz_Dude> heh.
<bobthedinosaur> not memory you idiot
<bobthedinosaur> the ram
<Raid[Shower]> lol
<okram> ram = memory you idiot
<The_StarWarz_Dude> RAM IS MEMORY YOU DOLT

#46619 +(291)- [X]

<cin> i have friends in my bum
<cin> My mum says they're worms
<cin> But I know better

#46767 +(138)- [X]

<Slack> *sigh* yes sir. **kneels** ((lol))
<MaximumMango> > ((lol)) <--- doesn't that look kinky in an ascii sort of way?
<Dest> Yes.
<Dest> It looks like something I'd like to put my penis in.

#47586 +(170)- [X]

<Abstract> must be nice to have an employer who pays you
<lophyte> it is..
<lophyte> your employer don't pay you?
<Abstract> nah my clients suck major ass
<Abstract> and i hate them
<lophyte> lol
<Abstract> and the only thing i will ever code for them again is a spoon so they can eat my ass

#48778 +(276)- [X]

<gnawol> i hate can beer
<gnawol> i cant drink it
<gnawol> tastes like metal
<gnawol> like a steel dildo
<gnawol> not like ive sucked a steel dildo or anything

#49756 +(0)- [X]

<NiceAngel> anywayz...watching jackass bbl
<Linkadmin> I misread that for "whacking a jackass bbl"
<pantherqs> link> a mistake like that? blame it on bash. =P

#61239 +(366)- [X]

<maff> i know how to curb your childs videogame addiction
<maff> buy them a mac

#62519 +(341)- [X]

<_bryan_> its a good thing MS isn't in the condom business

#62874 +(608)- [X]

<Brandon17> I used to date a blind girl. Her name was ::... ..:.: .:::. .::.. ....: .:.::

#100498 +(289)- [X]

<TriNitY> how are u only 1/2 hour ahed?
<TriNitY> ur clock iz fux0r3d
<Mr_Man> i set my clocks ahead for no good reason other than i feel like i step into the future when i enter my room

#147245 +(196)- [X]

BuXtonZer0: i dunno why its such a good combo
BuXtonZer0: the goldfish are crunchy and cheesy, while the coke is cold, refreshing, sweet, and breaks down the goldfish
Benihana420: and your teeth
Benihana420: at the same time
BuXtonZer0: another plus

#149820 +(497)- [X]

<Ed> alright
<Ed> the world is completely fucked
<Ed> my neighbour has a "No visitors except by prior arrangement" sign
<Ed> thing is, I just found out that the bastard's a Jehova's Witness
<Ed> I wonder if a "No thanks, I'm a Protestant" would work any on my door

#152727 +(626)- [X]

Steve: so, why don't you just have anal sex with your ex?
Felix: I... can't afford that much lube?
Felix: I don't like making girls cry?
Felix: I don't like washing bloody sheets?
Felix: I couldn't deal with someone shitting on my dick.
Steve: well, technically..
Steve: they're not shitting your dick, you're dicking their shit.

#238166 +(537)- [X]

* Lemming hands out glasses full of an unidentifiable liquid.
<Lemming> beba la sandwich!
<red_cactus> you blended a sammich?
<red_cactus> *blenderd
<red_cactus> *blendered
<red_cactus> *put a sammich in a blender

#428416 +(414)- [X]

<MO-Pantsu> dentist gave me a temp crown and a HUGE lump of filling to hold it on. now I can feel the pain starting as the painkiller wears off and my jaw don't sit straight. In fact the temp crown is like sharp and shitty and I could bite my tongue off with it.
<karaipantsu> Why?  Linkin Park's music is awesome.  Their Lyrics leave a lot to be desired, but I don't put much stock in lyrics
<Cidsa> yeah
<Cidsa> i like the music a lot
<Cidsa> the guitar
<karaipantsu> I like their reliance on more non-rock related instruments.
<karaipantsu> Like Pro audio and piano
<Cidsa> yea
<Chimerasame> i just got my conversations crossed
<Chimerasame> i'm like "what the how does dentistry involve Pro audio"
<Chimerasame> i guess they can blast your plaque off with sound
<Cidsa> yeah
<Cidsa> they use a air blaster thing too
* MO-Pantsu whimpers
<Chimerasame> <dentist> "CRAAAAAAAAAWLING IN MY SKIIIIIIIIIIN" <tartar> well fuck this, i'm leaving

#483381 +(666)- [X]

<A_Analog> like alot of atheists I figured my life has absolutely no meaning even though I persue goals and have a job, school etc.
<lobyaway> A_Analog: the pain of existence
<A_Analog> yeah mate
<psykoz> well we're all just holograms anyway :).. vibrations in space time moving along the string of our universe, an instrument far beyond our comprehention
<A_Analog> amen
<lobyaway> pass the bong

#493363 +(1983)- [X]

<nxn> dude I'm playing tic tac toe with this chick over a doodle drawing thing
<nxn> I put down an X in the middle and she's like "OMFG CAMPER!!"

#689481 +(408)- [X]

<jcm> would having a woman as the main character change anything?
<jcm> it would still be GTA
<gwizz> yeah
<gwizz> grand theft alimony

#759758 +(1958)- [X]

dantose: Do u get a trophy 4 it????
rocker576: It occurs to me that typing "u" instead of "you" and "4" instead of "for" saved you 4 (not "for") keystrokes. Typing "????" instead of "?" used 3 keystrokes plus the use of the shift button for a total of 4 keystrokes. Thus, you have saved no effort whatsoever by kicking the English language.

#937420 +(394)- [X]

<xved> I turned on some trance radio, and now I want to code
<thomashc> I turned on Laura Pausini and now I want to fap!
<Tekk_> I turned on glen beck
<Tekk_> and now I want to die

#954927 +(187)- [X]

<chainsoar> fox news special: computer terrorists blow up several internets
<chainsoar> at least 45% of the network of tubes is damaged beyond repair
<Jill_Stihl> They are trying to hack your freedom!
<chainsoar> FACT: hackers can break into the CIA mainframe and actually _download your freedom_

0.0561 21096 quotes approved; 1596 quotes pending
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