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#1361 +(142)- [X]

<immi> i want madonnas pussy
<dr\gonzo> besides you putting your penis inside madonna would be like you putting your penis out the window
<dr\gonzo> that shit has to be sooooo loose

#1640 +(1479)- [X]

<Inoshiro> Wth
<Inoshiro> "Don't iron, don't put in a triangle, don't put in an oval"
<harb> Er?
<Inoshiro> Is there a translation table for the washing tag on clothing?

#1776 +(471)- [X]

<cait-sith> being in love
<R0y> i wish
<R0y> it's all just confusing emotion
<R0y> one minute you think you love her, the next minute you're on yahoo masturbating with girls in the united states

#3239 +(245)- [X]

<BuSteR> afk my eyes are bleeding from this intense conversation

#4457 +(396)- [X]

<phubuh> WHY THE HELL DO PEOPLE DO THIS
<phubuh> I JUST DOWNLOADED SoF2 AND IT WAS BLACK&WHITE
<phubuh> OH I KNOW I'LL NAME IS SOF2 SO MORE PEOPLE DOWNLOAD FROM ME AND USE MY BANDWITH OR HEY WAIT A MINUTE
<Katana> I tried downloading Harry Potter and got Ancient Secrets of Asian Sex

#5586 +(396)- [X]

| Lavalamp is (~lava@www.childrenpalace.edu.vn])
<@madog> vietnam sucks anyway
<Lavalamp> vn = vietnam?
<Lavalamp> maybe that's why it's so lagged
<@madog> *sigh*
<@Guilty> I figured Vietnam would have a wonderful network of fiber since all the holes were already dug

#6068 +(2233)- [X]

<GaeMan> Chia: Be nice to CAgurl today.
<chirpet> I am always nice to CAgurl. I resent the implication.
<chirpet> I am nice to everyone.
<chirpet> Always.
<chirpet> So shut up.
<chirpet> pigfucker.

#7342 +(307)- [X]

<skankuhz> I work my bung muscles every night, just in case i have to go to jail, I'll rip off a mans tip if he tries to ass fuck me!

#7986 +(205)- [X]

<CrazySpence> e-mail is just really lagged irc

#8105 +(173)- [X]

<frail> there are places that should never be scraped
<frail> "get your hand out of my pants and use an emory board you son of a bitch!
<flee> ok, if you want an emory board on your genitals, sure.
<adric> i think id prefer nails to an emory board..
<adric> granted id want them to be short, clean and smooth..
<flee> I like my men short, clean and smooth.
<adric> damn i have the short and clean down.. but i think im all corners..
<flee> not that type of smooth
<flee> smooth like a razor blade you don't notice in the shotglass of gin
<bob> shaven, not stirred

#8118 +(914)- [X]

[20:52] <MrSnuffles> hello
<MrSnuffles> anyone?
<MrSnuffles> talk to me
<MrSnuffles> ;(
<Bug> hello MrSnuffles
<MrSnuffles> no, not you

#8228 +(250)- [X]

<alexei^se> I need a new hd
<alexei^se> 10gb hd yah yah!
<xK|servo> ya i have a 20 just got a 40
<xK|servo> mfr at office max was like hey pal need some extra space for all them mpeg files
<xK|servo> i was like shit you got me man
<xK|servo> hes like hey dont worry we all do

#8680 +(124)- [X]

<jamesn> max: best become a sales guy
<jamesn> those jobs are easy to get
<jamesn> and you dont need skillz
<undrewb> heh
<MMouse> both. yeah i was thinking sales, but that's like a last resort
<undrewb> but to get into sales, you need to be a superficial wanker with no clue...
<undrewb> oh.. ok :)

#9246 +(11)- [X]

<BiG_GuY> did u know mother fucker what im gonna to do
*** BiG_GuY Quit (Quit: Leaving)

#10021 +(291)- [X]

<matts> I was on vacation and I saw this casino advertisement  on the highway: "LOOSEST $1 SLOTS" and they had a picture of a woman on it and then I realized that this casino ad could be taken the wrong way :P

#11620 +(400)- [X]

<Astroboy> Im going to murder the next girl I ever hear make some comment about being over weight.
<Astroboy> Unless the girl is like 500 pounds.
<Trinity> I am so over weight.
<Astroboy> Trinity way to be a absurdly difficult distance away for me to murder you.

#13213 +(7766)- [X]

<Spazz> Seems like when I say "FUCK" you get an EOF error  :o
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Bartolimis> fuck
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Bartolimis> fuck
<Spazz> fuck
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Spazz> fuck
<Bartolimis> stop
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Bartolimis> we're done >:)
<Ranto> hmh?
<Spazz> Your client got an error...
<Bartolimis> yeah, we're done saying fuck
<Spazz> everytime we said f***
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Spazz> Quit saying fukc
<Bartolimis> my bad
<Spazz> fuck*
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Icc> Someone says fuck and he drops ?
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)

#14203 +(209)- [X]

<stormin> what's asl?
<Xiautau> age/sex/location
<Xiautau> teen channels have that shit
<Xiautau> not that i go to teen channels

#19346 +(128)- [X]

<Despondent> Got a problem with it? speak to /dev/null
<Tricks> wtf is /dev/null
<Despondent> I don't know, what is it?
<Tricks> i think u do mate
<Tricks> and thats probably the sad thing

#21882 +(383)- [X]

(FakeBoobies): any one wanna to chat to a guy pretending to be a chick with a pic of some model off the internet, msg me

#22604 +(139)- [X]

<Affe> i got a dual head card today
<Arcane> what kind of dualhead card?
<Affe> radeon
<cardian> they make a radeon dual head?
<cardian> which one
<Affe> i dunno
<cardian> you dont know which card you bought?
<cardian> were you high?
<Affe> no
<Affe> it was a trade for services
<cardian> ahh
<Arcane> blowjob?
<Arcane> it musta been shitty head if they gave you a radeon
<cardian> hhaaahha

#23542 +(103)- [X]

<v33n> ok skep is gone mad, he is stabbing him self now
*** v33n sets mode: +b *!*@d226-65-122.home.cgocable.net
*** v33n was kicked by v33n (i'll unban you when you sleep)

#33810 +(117)- [X]

<@igl0> i blame her , and entirley her that i m doomed to hang out in channels like #incomplete-warez

#38474 +(131)- [X]

* FreeFrag finds it strange that as hardware gets older, your respect for it lessens.
<milenko> FreeFrag: same with wives

#40392 +(181)- [X]

[+Badtz] good sex = the best shit out there
[@orion] what's the bandwidth requirements?

#42408 +(88)- [X]

<TML> simon-: You're single, aren't you?
<simon-> TML, yes, why?
<TML> simon-: I can tell by the fact you think in terms of
'TML->wife'
<octatron> TML: would you have used TML['wife']? :P
<TML> octatron: No. I'd use wife->TML

#46161 +(146)- [X]

<haz3l> Anyone in here interested in working on a mod? It features advanced gameplay with vehicles as well
<toad-> haz3l, yes
<toad-> and by yes I meant get the fuck out
<haz3l> toad
<haz3l> pm

#47108 +(674)- [X]

Jahidi:   like 10 minutes ago i was walking down the hall and it sounded like
          that ugly freak of nature with the unibrow that lives next door was
          fucking some other dude...freaked me out
bbyhewie: really?
Jahidi:   yeah...but it must have been something else...couldn't have been that
bbyhewie: how do you know, maybe he just happened to meet the most pathetic
          inbred dumbass cock-starved crackhead loser of all time and they're
          gonna live happily ever after.
Jahidi:   Nah, you wern't idle

#48419 +(240)- [X]

<White_Devil> ppl who put down other ppl from other countries are basicly ingnorant...We are all from the human race and the sooner ppl can put away their bias, the sooner they can be dominated by the USA

#49590 +(108)- [X]

#60115 +(526)- [X]

<+Rustblade> I'm so angry!!
<+Rustblade> fucking computer
<+Rustblade> I'm gonna kick it
* +Rustblade kicks his computer *
Quits: Rustblade (rustblade@northface.intercarve.net) (Remote host closed the connection)

#70491 +(1837)- [X]

<ShoveX> beerman would you have gay sex for 2 million dollars?
<@Beerman> with who
<@Beerman> and do I have to pay all at once
<@Beerman> or can I pay in instalments

#73067 +(68)- [X]

!dmwaters*! This is a wallops message for the Freenode network If you do not wish to see theese messages, type /mode yournick -w now. Thank you for using Freenode!:)
!lilo*! This is a WALLOPS message for freenode.  These messages contain non-critical comments and announcements and detailed server info.  If you'd like to turn them off, '/mode <yournick> -w' works on most clients.  Thank you for using freenode!
!lilo*! For reference, this is a non-critical comment.  Erm, wait.  Yeah.  I think.
!brd*! m00 cow m00.. This is a non-critical m00, please stay tuned for further m00s
!lilo*! Hmph.
!brd*! ;P

#77712 +(298)- [X]

<Burning> it's funny 'cause it's out of context

#100796 +(478)- [X]

* Evil-PR-Director changes topic to 'IRC - Where the men are men, the women are men, and anyone under 18 has a .gov ident.'

#103111 +(224)- [X]

<genesis> mommy, why doesnt bc do logic math?
<ch> because you touch yourself.
<genesis> a world without bit shifts is a world i dont want to masturbate in

#134558 +(334)- [X]

<Fr0d0> Just imagin what wars would be like if instead of battle hardend soldiers, they used nerds and geeks.
<H4ndalfTehGh3y> "D00d! j00 sh0tz0r m333!11!11 Wut r u?!?!? 4 FFFFAAAAGGG?!!!?!"

#334679 +(635)- [X]

<^sWift> omfg
<^sWift> this shit is horrible
<^sWift> McDonalds now offering a free music download with the purchase of a Big Mac Extra Value Meal
<^sWift> "an average of 12 songs on a CD, so that's about 7200 calories you will need to consume in order to get an album's worth of music"
<^sWift> ahaha
<^sWift> People are willing to slowly kill themselves for free mp3s

#384245 +(396)- [X]

(weaseL) the nurse at the the reception at the doctors is hot
(Venge) oh, so that's why they think you have asthma...

#393323 +(107)- [X]

<Obiwan> Koreans are kicking ass at men's all around gymnastics...
<Obiwan> ....don't ask why I'm watching men's gymnastics....
<Nimdae> you like their tight asses
<Obiwan> well they don't show ass that much
<Obiwan> their pants are too loose
<Obiwan> sigh
<Obiwan> actually I turned it on and I saw a korean.
<Nimdae> you just proved you are watching their asses

#462621 +(1065)- [X]

Wardave: My girlfriend tells me I'm lazy and have no ambition.
CancersDan: Dump her ass
Wardave: I should but that's just way too much work

#553790 +(3718)- [X]

<Victorian_Skunk> Is there a new virus going around? My Windows has suddenly changed to another language! I think it's Croatian.
<Dan> You Got Serbed!

#571740 +(2417)- [X]

DerANgeD: not cool! ctrl+w closes firefox 
DerANgeD: I was trying to press shift+w and accidentally hit my ctrl button 
Triumph: whats shift+w?
DerANgeD: a capital W dumbass

#632900 +(678)- [X]

<sdodson> can you provide that in wma format?
<Corydon76-home> Only if you can provide an encoder
<Corydon76-home> but it has to be able to run on my Apple IIgs
<Wonton> Wma sucks
<sdodson> you can encode oggs on your Apple IIgs?
<Corydon76-home> No, but if you're going to be an asshole about encoding formats, I'm going to be an asshole about the platform the encoder needs to run on.
<Catonic> lol

#663354 +(1877)- [X]

<Chalklatemilk> ok so im wacking off to a video of two lesbians fucking eachother
<Chalklatemilk> then i hear my mom walking down the hall to this room
<Chalklatemilk> so i quickly close the video
<Chalklatemilk> then she walks in and im sitting with my pants down, left hand around the cock, and she looks at me...then looks at the screen...my desktop was open and had three naked gnomes standing by a fireplace...the look on her face as she left the room will stick with me till the day i die.

#670911 +(846)- [X]

<Sic> I seen a story about a guy who took the horse cock up the ass but it was angled so it pushed in all the way, he died from internal bleeding.. There was a whole video. :p
<LLora> your ass is designed for poop
<LLora> not for horse cock
<antek> i wonder what the last thing going through his head was
<antek> BESIDES A HORSE'S COCK

#685939 +(1525)- [X]

<pmcall221> I'm wondering when Windows will work they they say it will.
<Kittyflipping> You're criticizing millions of lines of code and you can't even get one sentence right?

#695394 +(495)- [X]

<Monso> is california on the east coast or west?
<cpM> did it move?

#770001 +(277)- [X]

YukiNagato: As much as I do tend to play games that are generally enjoyed by virginal fat dudes, I wouldn't touch WoW with a ten foot pole.
YukiNagato: It's just that the whole "KILL MONSTERS LEVEL UP. RINSE. REPEAT" thing is kinda old.
Semantic: That's not entirely true. It turns out that many WoW players forget the rinse part.

#894335 +(125)- [X]

<Chi>: So we went to the pool hall last Wednesday...
<Chi>: I ended up paying for everyone when we finished.
<Chi>: Everyone asked how much it cost afterwards.
<Chi>: I told them that I used my Asian powers to get no charge.
<Chi>: Then on our way down the stairs...
<Chi>: I jumped onto the carpet in front of the door and exclaimed...
<Chi>: "Okay Abz, time to use your Arabian powers to fly us home!"
<Chinh>: did it work?
<Chi>: No, the carpet was black.
<Chinh>: zing!

0.0411 20982 quotes approved; 4627 quotes pending
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