#824 +(299)- [X]
<arcaDEATH> I thought Tetris was like Solitare?
#1104 +(543)- [X]
<var> 40 ping dont mean shit if it jerks and stops like a fucking epileptic in a strobe light
#3371 +(422)- [X]
<orion> A FUCKING GAY CLUB
<orion> HOMOS WILL TOUCH MY FUCKING FLYER
<orion> this is a NIGHTMARE
<orion> where's my time-release cyanide capsule of death
<Guilty> Now orion, you arent gay from homo's touching a flyer you made
<Guilty> Unless said flyer is a picture of your dick
<Guilty> Which knowing you, it might be
#4253 +(262)- [X]
<FarginBoard> I tried to get AIDS once, but even those people wouldn't do it with me
#4768 +(267)- [X]
*** [ric] is now known as reign
*** reign is now known as [ric]
<[ric]> heh... mental note... try /whois instead of /nick next time
#6563 +(14)- [X]
<copernicu> Though it is the fourth largest city in the country, Houston's television market ranks 11th.
<WonkoSane> how does a tv market rank 11th if they're 4th in population?
<CubsWoo> Remember Houston is close to Mexico
#6786 +(389)- [X]
<nwa_> someone sniff me and send me a copy of all the info you collect, i am most interested
<beeMind> nwa_: I've been sniffing you and I have some info. You smell funny.
#8282 +(563)- [X]
<sum1tolded2medatvirtrghey> i thought you did music?
<baygledawg> oh i wish
<baygledawg> that would be my second dream job
<sum1tolded2medatvirtrghey> what's your first? professional sperm producer?
<baygledawg> ok, writing music would be my third dream job
#11627 +(244)- [X]
<Temujin> PRIDE AND PREJUDICE SUCKS COCK
<Aboshirk> Bingley! Yes, he bites invisible biscuits.
<Temujin> Does he?
<Aboshirk> Yes. Watch the BBC thing and you'll see.
<Temujin> Adam, my mom saw it. Said that Mrs. Bennet's voice made her want to smash the TV in.
<Trucci> violent mom!
<Aboshirk> That's an accurate response.
<Temujin> The she said "OH YEAH!" like Randy Savage.
<Max> then she snapped into a Slim Jim
#16594 +(189)- [X]
Ps3000: what are you doing tomorrow at 3:45?
SocialistNinja: waking up
#16767 +(20)- [X]
<cloud_171> u can't learn lots of stuff by reading
#17421 +(8)- [X]
<isd> if I could suck my dick, I would never leave my house
#18208 +(210)- [X]
<runedx2> the other day... my cat was in my lap.. and i was petting it. but then i realized there wasn't a cat in my lap. :(
#22883 +(104)- [X]
<p13-om1kron> wtg, my mom is all like, "clean room, mess, now"
<BX|AnarchE> tell her if she sucks your cock, you'll consider it
<BX|AnarchE> that'll keep her on her toes
#23096 +(437)- [X]
<nicks> I drew the most realistic cock you'd ever see on a graphic calculator yesterday in math class
#24970 +(208)- [X]
<czth> cue jokes about dyslexic agonostic insomniac that stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog
#34296 +(712)- [X]
[17:10:00] <aamir> hi
[17:10:17] <aamir> hello
[17:10:17] <Kelavat> hi
[17:10:36] <aamir> asl plz
[17:11:59] <Kelavat> oh why the hell does everyone always ask that, does it really metter what the fuck my asl is, obviously im not a kid and not very femenine so if you planning on hitting on someone just get a baseball bat and knock yourself out cause its the only beating you'll get tonight
[17:13:25] <aamir> asl
[17:14:20] <Kelavat> you dont get it do you, I am not going to answer your friggin asl
[17:14:42] <aamir> y my dear
[17:15:58] <Kelavat> you drink a lot dont you?
#34361 +(424)- [X]
<est> are you addicted to pornography?
<ben> 5gb is not an addiction.
#40511 +(169)- [X]
<rigel> maybe a few centuries from now, year 2k would be remembered solely for the goatse.cx homepage.
<rigel> "the dark rectum dilation century"
<avoozl> it'll probably be the only thing that survives the nuclear winter
#41139 +(319)- [X]
<Fang> 2002 will suck.
<Fang> if the way i entered it is any indication.
<joshie> Fang: you entered it sucking?
#42331 +(549)- [X]
<Dezzy> actually i was looking for girlie porn for my boyfriend
<Beerman> you're a girlie
<Beerman> you can MAKE girlie porn!
<Dezzy> hm.... true...
#42388 +(14)- [X]
<ZeroHour> that NYLUG looked decent
<ZeroHour> if we did a Mississippi LUG
<ZeroHour> it would be a buncha grungy ass rednecks
<ZeroHour> with ghetoo laptops and paintless rides
<ZeroHour> rides where the paint peeled off
<ZeroHour> rides with different colors on each panel of the body of the vehicle
#46687 +(70)- [X]
<Gusty> being black would be cool
<Gusty> you could have your own neighbourhood
<Gusty> where the cops are afraid to go
#47279 +(669)- [X]
<UPC747> do you need bitches Max?
<Max> I have man bitches
<Max> man, what a fucking typo
#58154 +(245)- [X]
<asdasd> spellig? excuse me asshole...I got a+ in englsih
#59641 +(318)- [X]
<Fat-Burrick> What i want to know is why gandalf didnt rescue merry and pippin from the ents
<Tumbleweed> would you?
<Fat-Burrick> good point
#72270 +(1250)- [X]
<@X-G> ownage is such a capitalistic term.
<@X-G> YOUR ASS WILL BE EVENLY DISTRIBUTED TO THE PEOPLE BASED ON NEED!!11~
#81227 +(134)- [X]
<GaPSk8t3r> if i was drafted for war, id use every fucking cfg hack and aimbot out there.....i doubt iraq has wwcl
#85982 +(506)- [X]
<Stugein> Headless body in garbage bag discovered near Devil's Slide
<Stugein> First line of article:
<Stugein> The San Mateo County Sheriffs Office is treating Sundays gruesome discovery of a headless body as a homocide.
<Stugein> AS OPPOSED TO WHAT?!
#87759 +(918)- [X]
<hawkman> my friend had a huge bloody nose in 11th grade, and he just shoved toilet paper up his nose until it stopped. then my friend grabbed a coat hanger out of his car (i'm not really sure why he had one), then we went into the girls bathroom and spread blood _ALL_ over one of the stalls, left the coat hanger there, and put up a sign that said "please dont flush my baby"
#97955 +(353)- [X]
<Zer0_-X-> animeology - the study of japanese animation
<ecat> u must study it quite well
<Zer0_-X-> i've got phd :D
<Goddess> permanent head damage?
#99827 +(518)- [X]
<sta_hi> "anything can be a murder weapon, if you have enough time on your
<GrassMunk> soggy bread?
<sta_hi> ESPECIALLY soggy bread.
<GrassMunk> one blade of grass
<sta_hi> yes, that too
<sta_hi> ... if you remove the top of one's head first.
<sta_hi> or could somehow get it into his bloodstream.
<sta_hi> flacid severed penis?
<sta_hi> that too.
<sta_hi> thats destroyed more lives than any gun.
#99911 +(877)- [X]
<Moogs> Matrix Reloaded is a very different kind of film from the original, both in style and theme. The first movie posed the question, "What is the nature of reality?" The question for this movie is, "Do French people ever stop talking?" - MacHall
<WrexSoul> Or perhaps, "Why is Colonel Sanders sitting in a room full of TVs?"
#136740 +(220)- [X]
<konik> First of all let me say that Mac zealots should be rounded up into cattle cars, gassed to death and incinerated to make certain there is no remaining genetic material that might infect the rest of the gene pool.
<pixagen> there is a guy at work who always tells people that their system would never fail, be slow, freeze, or cause stress if it was a Mac
<pixagen> i tried to stab him but he is nimble and spry
<natx> tell him i love him
#138378 +(604)- [X]
<omega> i have a question.
<omega> is your community THAT small that you're so bored and lifeless that you need to spam communities that are 20x bigger?
<FFk> how about i answer your question, with another question.
<FFk> Have you ever seen a naked man ride a horse?
#212492 +(483)- [X]
<nitrofenix> fucking cunt
<nitrofenix> i mean
<nitrofenix> distasteful individual.
#216818 +(717)- [X]
<+usrbingeek> NBC has announced it will air a three-episode marathon of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy opposite the Super Bowl on February 1st.
<+usrbingeek> So, if you get tired of watching a bunch of buff, sweaty men in uniforms patting each other on the ass and bending over to pass something between their legs, you now have the choice of watching something really gay.
#363454 +(1475)- [X]
genjer: so my sister asks me if this shirt makes her look fat
genjer: and I was like, "no the fat underneath does"
#373740 +(375)- [X]
* @etelmo gets the RIAA on Merlin for his MP3's
<Merlin> what MP3s?
<@etelmo> They can find anything, even if it isnt there
<@etelmo> they should make em search iraq
#413285 +(1656)- [X]
<Teratogen> What did the drunk say to Jesus when Jesus dropped the cross?
<@James> uh oh
<Teratogen> "You keep dropping that thing and they're gonna throw you outta the parade."
*** You have been kicked from channel #bible (that was so not funny)
#416169 +(647)- [X]
<Riley> Stop Rape, Say yes.
#419747 +(780)- [X]
cpufreak04: Fun fact.
cpufreak04: Take 'HAL' from 2001: A Space Odyssey
cpufreak04: And move every letter one letter forward (Y=Z, X=Y)
cpufreak04: What do you get?
#546383 +(423)- [X]
<Shiv> really, how can you make a "combatting illiteracy" poster anyway?
<Shiv> make it a map to the library?
#551813 +(2210)- [X]
Mike: I had a random thought in the shower just before
Mike: I think I was still half asleep
Mike: if you smacked a kid in the face with a bottle of johnson's no more tears, would it create beautiful irony?
#593081 +(6610)- [X]
<Pax> I wish my lawn was emo, so it would cut itself.
#619614 +(2566)- [X]
<Conflict> my girlfriend tattooed this guy's dick last week and when i came home i was like "how'd the tattoo go?" and she goes "fine, except that I needed both hands so I had to hold his cock in my mouth." i was like "thats ni-you whaaa?!??"
#763307 +(783)- [X]
<j0e> when i want to download music i look up what the band thinks about filesharing
<j0e> if they're okay with it, i download the song
<j0e> if they're against it, i download the song out of spite
<UriGeller> what if they haven't said anything on filesharing
<j0e> that's what i call a tacit endorsement
#796742 +(1257)- [X]
<ed> I get a tad weirded out when he prays on his prayer rag in the cubicle
<ed> He says he's facing Mecca. My GPS says he's facing Detroit.
<ed> He's going to end up in Heaven with 77 Pintos and a Ford Maverick.
#818078 +(1078)- [X]
<matt> Can anyone help me solve a two body problem?
<dsk> Id sink them in the ocean or feed them to pigs
<dsk> but if you do the pigs make sure to remove hair and teeth first
<matt> Umm i meant in physics...
#894334 +(583)- [X]
<BobbyJenkins> Any GLBT fellow Scots going to the Pride Scotia March at the end of this month in Edinburgh?
<Sensationalism> I take it you are going? If I go to any Pride events this year, it'll be my first. I'm excited!
<BobbyJenkins> I was going to but I found out I've got work.
<Lost-Chances> Call in gay.