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#216 +(68)- [X]

[iMike] zach if you got a bike we could ride up to west manchester
[iMike] get a kickass one

#396 +(329)- [X]


#440 +(555)- [X]

<blazemore> we know your hand gets more action jax0ring than your feet do walking
<scar`1> yeah well that's also caused by the fact that i hardly walk

#3218 +(510)- [X]

<Richie> i kinda sent him the strange link to gay porn
<duckman> so he sent you here?
<Richie> revenge is strange sometimes
<Joshua> well... i guess we know what we have to do...
* Joshua takes off his pants

#5020 +(543)- [X]

<iban> when i was your age all i had was a mac, and photoshop
<iban> if i wanted an online gf i had to draw her

#6473 +(589)- [X]

<trance> ooo the heat is on in my house, my dad must have gotten a raise

#8213 +(140)- [X]

<gamma8> well i hope you enjoy it then!
<c0c0nutz> thanks G8, I hope so too cause honestly.. I rather be on bed right now
* gamma8 feels like an important summit of industrialised nations
<gamma8> that's the sort of thing that gives you a nice warm and fuzzy feeling inside... :)

#8501 +(326)- [X]

<cactoid> you love the Colonel
<cactoid> I like KFC chippies
<cactoid> and zinger burgers
<cactoid> the rest tastes ok while you're eating it but it's just fucking gross greasy fried vermin
<Bayls> Yeah, the chips are ace.
<Bayls> The actual chicken pieces are shit.
<Bayls> You may as well sculpt some lard into a shape the looks like a drumstick, then coat it with butter. Then roll it in lard, then melt fat onto it, then fry it in animal fat, dip it in lard then eat it.
<Bayls> I think 10 out of the 11 secrec "herbs and spices" are "lard".
<Bayls> Mmmm, making me hungry. Might go get a 21 piece bucket. :)
*** Signoff: Bayls

#9117 +(758)- [X]

<Mikado`> 128's were down to 70 1.5 months ago
<JohnnyBra> 1.5 months???
<JohnnyBra> when the hell did we start talking in decimals!
<mankindJB> 2.3 minutes ago

#10345 +(553)- [X]

<AceAway> well later bitches of to the hospital
<SForce> that sounds promising
<AceAway> not really spend half my life going to them all part of being stuck in this damn wheelchair
<SForce> unfortunate
<SForce> makes me want to stand up

#10361 +(363)- [X]

<AsylumXKP> And it hard to hit on the German chicks thanks to the thick language barrier.
<Erdrick> just pull it out and point to it

#10611 +(138)- [X]

<+b00st> leaving for sleep and other related things
<+b00st> don't ask

#11688 +(481)- [X]

<Hydrac7> nothing  better than seeing the reaction on fellow classmates faces after explaining bukkake for them
<Alice`> Nothing better than seeing the reaction on fellow classmates faces' after demonstrating bukkake to them
<Aboshi> Alice: The reaction all over their faces.

#11964 +(367)- [X]

<MAC_OS_X> why is everybody an asshole on here?

#13515 +(194)- [X]

<BetaCeti> 3 + 2 + 25 = ?
<Darth-Phenom> huh?
<Darth-Phenom> 31

#14729 +(256)- [X]

<Sin> there must be a better way to get money then to actulyl get a job

#19541 +(1497)- [X]

<Samurai> She isn't forcing anyone! she haven't asked them of nothingĹ!
<enisoc> how the hell do you type a Ĺ symbol by accident??

#23089 +(491)- [X]

<FFChatter> I wanna' change my nick!
<Onyx> type /nick (NAME HERE)
<FFChatter> Trying to trick me?....
<FFChatter> I won't fall for it....

#38003 +(248)- [X]

<Dayv> Australia is basically Canada with marsupials and funny hats.

#45109 +(206)- [X]

<_overkill> how do you eat high protein
<EnchWORK> bukkake

#49564 +(356)- [X]

<XorTiN> I am sad, I ain't got nuffin to do and all I can do is think about my g/f
<XorTiN> and she out partyin' w/ some friends or somethin
<XorTiN> and she's grounded so I can't call her
<LlnK> she's grounded.. yet she's out partying with guys?>
<LlnK> wtf
<LlnK> you're st00pid
* LlnK backhands some sense into XorTiN
<Illustrious> weird how she's out partyin and grounded
<Illustrious> and can't call you
<Illustrious> blah LlnK you bastard quit reading my mind
<LlnK> heh
<LlnK> Illustrious: i stopped when i saw all the kiddy and beastiality pr0n

#56120 +(182)- [X]

G3nki: my printer is printing subliminal messages on my paper
Keerax: ...o_O
G3nki: it's printing out "Join the Military!"
G3nki: like cutting half of it at the top of the page
Keerax: yvan eht nioj
G3nki: never!

#57933 +(189)- [X]

<SantaClaus> Santa on @#gaysouthcoast
<SantaClaus> spreading white christmas in all the wrong places

#58073 +(223)- [X]

<Nookadum> and yet I have NO spelling erros

#80047 +(400)- [X]

<Winta> Well well well
<Jess> dam dam dam
<Winta> yes yes yes
<Jess> oh sorry... I thought we were talking about things that water could be in

#80807 +(216)- [X]

<Consolelover> I need a life.
<Consolelover> DOn't get me wrong, my current one's fine.
<Consolelover> I'm just greedy. :{

#81453 +(424)- [X]

<TygerinFL> Halfy... remember the house I lived in when you and Vio visited us?
<HalfNote5> Yupper!
<TygerinFL> It burned to the ground tuesday night.
<TygerinFL> the lady living in it died
<TygerinFL> guess we shouldn't have taken all the smoke detectors when we left

#85251 +(647)- [X]

<skmt> not really. once i reach level 20 virgin, i get a masturbation skill point.
<PACHUKA> skmt: that is the dorkiest think ever said

#117078 +(255)- [X]

* RE_away just taped himself waving a broomstick and changed it into a lightsaber with the help of Video Editing Software
<RE_away> How productive
<RE_away> Now to do the same thing with my penis

#124609 +(309)- [X]

<sick-rdi> haha..i had sex in the car the other day
<BlAkEaGe> haha..i had sex on a pooltable yesterday
<sick-rdi> liar
<BlAkEaGe> Truths.
<sick-rdi> there is no girl, there is no pooltable
<BlAkEaGe> Just because you haven't seen a vagina doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
<sick-rdi> ive seen a vagina
<BlAkEaGe> Yeah.. porn.
<sick-rdi> ive actually licked and sucked on one
<BlAkEaGe> Don't lick your screen, it'll fuck it up.

#151296 +(1245)- [X]

<mystican> my sister gave me some socks and they say on them "too much wiggling of your joystick makes your eyes go funny"
<endura> myst u should use those socks as wank socks
<endura> then when they are orange make ur sister wash them
<DooMWiz> orange??

#161897 +(631)- [X]

<Kris> I tried to use an ouija board as a mouse-pad once, but my stupid <censored>ing mouse kept opening diablo2 when I wasn't watching

#163457 +(337)- [X]

<ILikeBush> its sad though, to see so many blind eyes.  Jesus' light is greater than anything you'll ever find here on Earth.
<Proz> Well I met Jesus, he made me a taco.

#173664 +(397)- [X]

<@minion> i think abortion is a time travelling alien's plot to stop us from advancing
<@NrK> no
<@NrK> conservitives are

#222068 +(741)- [X]

<ilifin> Crazy idea.
<ilifin> Keanu Reeves as Sauron
<ilifin> Hugo Weaving as Isildur
<ilifin> Keanu: How about I give you the finger.. and you give me back my ring.

#282906 +(107)- [X]

<Kiyone> i know you live in australia and everything, but do you know who vanilla ice is?
<reaper> yes
<reaper> he used to be a jazz musician, and became a pornstar

#332203 +(2565)- [X]

* jtal sets mode: +v
<jtal> no more talking from you young man
Mash- is now known as -WTF-_
-WTF-_ is now known as givemev
givemev is now known as plz-
plz- is now known as comon1
comon1 is now known as usux-
* usux- has quit IRC (you suck cock give me voice)
* usux- has joined #MethaneDev
* usux- has quit IRC (come on don't be a bitch)
* usux- has joined #MethaneDev
<jtal> OMFG DO YOU NOT SHUT THE FUCK UP! HOLY FUCKING SHIT JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP MAN! GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!!%!!!@!$@!)(@#*!()@)$04812041892801392onetwoninethreesevensix

#351086 +(809)- [X]

<Koushiro> "Religion is the opiate of the masses." -- Karl Marx
<Koushiro> "Winners don't do drugs." -- The FBI

#395664 +(290)- [X]

<Spydie> ive been playing games too much, when i close my eyes i see gun fights
<NuGgEt|mIRC> i see naked men

#398672 +(874)- [X]

sonotayuppy: hey now, Iíve gotten my ass mugged at gunpoint before
hoggman: watergun point
sonotayuppy: no
sonotayuppy: thirty eight point
sonotayuppy: the "poor manís machete"
hoggman: you shoulda kung foo'd his ass
sonotayuppy: I wish I knew kung fu
sonotayuppy: do you know kung fu?
hoggman: Iím a 7th degree black belt
sonotayuppy: seventh degree? That sounds rather made up
hoggman: you dare question master thomas???
sonotayuppy: yes, I do dare question master thomas
sonotayuppy: as he sounds made up as well
hoggman: OHHHH
sonotayuppy: since when are you a master?
sonotayuppy: what in the name of jebus was that?
hoggman: you are paralized from the eyebrows down
sonotayuppy: well Iíll be damned, youíre right
hoggman: here eat this sausage

#440309 +(386)- [X]

<Gravit> Poker, beer, and lucky charms. What does that make us? :)
<Roverpup> Irish.

#444533 +(894)- [X]

yancan c o o k: im sry man..
yancan c o o k: if u ever need someone
yancan c o o k: u know
yancan c o o k: a shoulder to cry on
yancan c o o k: or like
yancan c o o k: someone to talk to
yancan c o o k: then
yancan c o o k: go fuck urself
yancan c o o k: cuz thats not me

#599113 +(555)- [X]

<brukA> I'd hire a pornstar. Everytime I see one they're hard at work.

#667490 +(2961)- [X]

<Pedlya> So I got this really big usb drive, and me and my dad are trying to put shit on it.
*Simpe has entered #cancelled
<Pedlya> my dad said its too big, and I guess it was
<Pedlya> so my mom comes in and is trying to push it in...it still didnt go in
<Pedlya> my brother uses his and it fits fine, so we just use his
* Simpe has quit IRC (I dont want to know dude... )

#677056 +(1256)- [X]

<Tyranu[work]> tried to have a customer complaint about a mouse that only worked to the sides and not up and down.... found out later that he didn't move the mouse forward/backwards but rather lifted it up and down... a part of me died that day

#679080 +(1793)- [X]

<Ulm> Sigh. I've lost my cow.
<Ulm> I think she's learned to open her gate and she's gone.
<Ulm> Been looking for about 5 hours now.
<dal-X> Need more cowbell.

#682409 +(2773)- [X]

<Ranbert> someone shoot me please....
<tele>   o                              \O_ Arrgh!!
<tele>  <\==-   -   - -   -  -  - --- __/
<tele>  / \                             \

#714545 +(313)- [X]

<McKain> in psychology
<McKain> we were discussing sleep
<McKain> and the blind kid with bad hearing asks
<McKain> "I heard that if you are dreaming and falling, and you hit the ground, you die for real"
<McKain> and my professor immediately says "Yes. You die."
<McKain> I LOL'd so hard
<McKain> then someone else asks
<McKain> "I hear that if you have a nightmare in which you die, you die for real"
<McKain> and he goes "No, that's complete rubbish"
<McKain> I wanted to ask "I hear if you are dreaming that you are battling zombies and you get bitten, you will wake up and be a zombie. True or false, Professor? TRUE OR FALSE?!"

#740638 +(339)- [X]

<bloodfart> this homeless dude was eating a pie
<bloodfart> that someone bought him
<destx> wicked
<bloodfart> he got up to cross the road and tripped over, dropping the pie
<bloodfart> as if your life couldnt get any worse

#865098 +(2913)- [X]

<FossZombie> wtf
<FossZombie> quote "so you are 23 years old right?" me: "yes" them: "did you have any programming experiance in the 1970s"
* Wolfed hails FossZombie
<FossZombie> I'm tempted to say yes
<Wolfed> It would have been interesting.
<FossZombie> Yes in 1971 I was the lead computer scientist for the military, until 1975 when I switched jobs and worked for zenith for a short period of time until 1980s when I switched over to the atari group programming team. In 1984 I was born and that pretty much ended my career as a programmer.
<FossZombie> I spent the next three years shitting myself and learning how to speak and learn my ABCs

0.0716 21090 quotes approved; 1032 quotes pending
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